Single discrimination, I have enough

This article was first published in the New Weekly APP

Author: Goto

Reading "Single Men's Death is more mortality" feels like

Married people are healthy and happy, while the average single is even more unfortunate. /"Big Bang" stills

If you say something to be blocked in the past two weeks, you will definitely see two articles with "single sin theory" one after another.

One is called "The Health of Single", and the other is called "Single Singles, a higher mortality rate". I do n’t know why I hit me.

Let's take a look at the point of view of the article. The common arguments of the two articles are "Singles have higher risk of death and poor health status compared to the married people." Specifically, single people are more likely to get sick. What cardiovascular and cerebrovascular diseases, cancer, dementia, breast nodules, and a higher birth rate.

The truth seems not difficult to understand: two people can fight more effectively to external pressure, because there are lovers beside we, our body's ability to relieve stress and relief anxiety is better; Many, whether it is income or connections.

But aren't these prerequisites based on a "good and healthy and stable close relationship"?

"Compared with the married people, singles have a higher risk of death and poor health." /Surging news data

However, the research in the article did not make a more detailed division of the married people. Instead, it was simply divided into two groups: "married person" and "unmarried person". And the average single is even more unfortunate.

You who are single, or you are tired of intimacy, do you feel a sign of rising blood pressure?

That's right, this is a typical "compression of marriage hegemony". More broadly, it is a kind of love and hegemony. This concept is better than single in all aspects.

The American scholar Elizabeth Brake, who proposed this concept, found that all kinds of imagination of human society is often based on the "marriage and love" unit. It is believed that love is higher than all other emotions. Even if lonely people are not shameful, at least unfortunately.

Even if lonely people are not shameful, at least unfortunately. /The album cover

For example, do you often hear the people around you say, "Life without marriage is incomplete", "No marriage, because you haven't met the right person", "The life of two people is more interesting than one person's life" and so on. A series of remarks, whether you are single or not, but the society has default "you must not be happy enough."

First of all, single is not worthy of others. A few years ago, the word "single dog" was born in the air, and the meaning of the secret poking behind it was uncomfortable. Why, the single body was degraded by the personality, and would you "be eaten dog food"?

Walking on the street, ears are not Wang Xinling's "Love You", or Twins's "Love Be more", and finally wait for Lin Zhixuan's "Single Love Song", and the lyrics start to split lungs: "The world in the world:" The world Happy people are everywhere/why can't I count on me. "

Traveling, entertainment, and eating, and various types of commercial companies are not very friendly to those who are single. When you go to the amusement park, only couples have a special ticket but do not have "friends votes"; when they apply for driving school, couples can enjoy the package, but they can't join friends; go to KFC, no one can "second cup half price" with you, and can only be alone. Undertaking high prices.

Regardless of whether you are single, but society has default "you must not be happy enough." /"Escape Shame but useful"

Moreover, all festivals of all year round have been marketing as Valentine's Day, as if single people never need to celebrate.

Over time, it is difficult for singles to have doubts about their own status: Is it not good enough, so I couldn't enter long -term love relationships?

However, think about it, is there really such a god of marriage? Based on the "Estimation of the Rate Rate of Women's Behavior in 2018" released by the United Nations, 1/3 of women in the world have experienced domestic violence. The US COALITION AGAINST DOMESTIC VIOLENCE investigation found that 1/3 of American women and 1/4 American men have experienced violent compression in intimate relationships, including physical damage, non -voluntary behavior, and as well as Illegal tracking.

The World Economic Forum published an article "Failure's Marriage Harm is like a tobacco and alcohol": a study by the University of Nevada and Michigan University in the United States monitors 373 health status of couples in 16 years, and found that the health of couples with more contradictions in marriage They are seriously affected. Their appetite and pressure stress are worse, and they will eventually have negative impacts on heart function and immune system.

Failure of marriage is like tobacco and alcohol. /"Don't Talk to Strangers" stills

In addition, a study of 13008 people at the University of Wisconsin Madison showed that single individuals scored significantly in the two indicators of autonomy and individual growth than their married persons.

In the book "Rethinking Friendship", the author also pointed out that it is dangerous to bet on too much emotional needs on lovers. The diversity of emotional relationships may be exposed to helplessness once the betrayal of the lover, because the investment in friendship and affection is not enough, and it is difficult to find other emotional support for a while. The so -called "oppression of love hegemony" is the more essential reason that we have too much hope and expectations for love, and there will be the only Mr. Right in the general preset life. In people's subconsciousness, marriage and love have a kind of superpower that turns decay into magic. As long as there is love, the road of turning in life in life is flattened.

The fact is that this feeling is only applicable to couples in love. The trivial and conflict of daily life suppress the crazy secretion of dopamine. It may not be easier to take care of the life of the two people than one person's life.

Compared with the married person, singles are significantly higher in the two indicators of autonomy and personal growth. /"Big Bang" stills

No, Yu Xiuhua just announced the end of love with her boyfriend, and some netizens moved out of the mourning mission of "unfortunate life of life." People are just breaking up, not a mate, for it?

So, next time I hear who said that single life is single, single unfortunate, promise me -direct black, okay?

Reference materials:

Surging News | Data · Mingcha experts say that marriage makes people live longer. Is this true?

KY | "Single discrimination": It is a special thing to satisfy everything with love

KY | "Love hegemony oppression": Have you been troubled by the concept of "life must have love"?

World Economic Forum | Failed marriage hazards are like tobacco and alcohol

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