You are always like this, you will not say how sad.

Don't go back and fly forward.

Text / Taiyi

Some time ago, a lot of things happened around you.

As soon as I finished the night shift, before I had time to lie on the bed, you received a call from Dasao.

When we arrived together, we just passed the ambulance.

You looked at the car nervously, but didn't see anything. Instead, the house at the end of the road came out of crying.

Dasao sat on the ground and repeatedly said, "Obviously he got up at the toilet at 12 o'clock last night."

I hugged her and looked at you sitting at the door. There was no expression, just to call one by one.

Many people rushed over with red eyes and squeezed at the door to surround you.

While greeting the ice coffin in the corner of the living room, you asked the funeral home on the phone to ask the cremation process.

Do not forget to pat the shoulder of everyone, give them paper towels, and persuade the cried grandma to eat Dan Di Pill.

Until that night, you arranged everything properly, chanting the scriptures tomorrow, and going out of the mountain the day after tomorrow.

Back at home, you are paralyzed on the ground and don't speak.

I took out your pajamas from the closet and handed it to you silently.

"The clothes are all sweaty salt, take a bath."

"Give me the black one."

I haven't experienced it, so I just stunned, I don't know why you don't wear this favorite pajamas.

It wasn't until I saw the tears in the corner of your eyes that I realized how sad you were.

But you still didn't go to take a bath.

I didn't wait for me to turn to black clothes suitable for sleeping, and he heard the sound of your closure.

I chased out and asked where you were going.

The crying of the staircase that you tried his best to suppress: "I'm going to accompany my elder brother."

I'm not assured, pick up the motorcycle key and run downstairs and follow you.

We who are unkempt, sitting in the living room where we usually gather together for the New Year, sitting overnight.

The nephew was perfect, sitting next to us, and picked up the a little wrinkled bookkeeping book on the coffee table.

The words above are not good -looking, but they are neatly written:

In the Spring Festival, the second brother purchased and the younger brother cooks.

Braised goose, pork, beef, abalone, squid, kale, cabbage, ginkgo sweet soup.

"I don't know where to get together next Spring Festival."

After listening to the nephew, you suddenly destroyed the cigarette butt, walked to the ice coffin, and squatted slightly.

You stroked the glass lid over and over again, watching it for a long time.

The clock rang five times, and the two chickens fed by the neighbors began to sing.

I asked you to go to the room for a while, you shook your head and walked in again after a while.

When you fell asleep, the nephew told me that it was the room where his father had rest during his lifetime.

Later, we recited the scriptures, kneeled, put on a white shirt, and clamped with black sleeves.

A lot of people who knew and did not know that day, row up the growth dragon, walked on the road, followed behind the van.

You didn't catch up with the team, half of the way, you ran over, and hurried to forget to win a chrysanthemum.

I give you the chrysanthemum on my hand, you did not pick it up.

Probably thinking, so you can owe him forever.

He returned home from the funeral home that night, and you said he wanted to go to the beach to blow a blow.

But for two and a half hours, you didn't go home.

I was scared and cried, called you a lot of calls, and kept calling and fighting.

Until you opened the door of the house, apologized that the mobile phone was forgotten and turned off.

I rushed up and hugged you crying. You must have a charging treasure with you in the future. Do not listen to the phone or disappear suddenly.

You patted my shoulder and said, "Okay, don't worry about me."

How can you not worry about you?

In the past three days, everyone was crying and swollen eyes, and my throat was dumb. Only you had no tears, and he held everything.

But I know more than anyone else. How important is your elder brother to you, how much you are reluctant, you don't want to accept it.

You are just supporting.

Speaking of which, I am quite like you.

In the years 400 kilometers away from you, my emotional illness broke out several times, but I didn't tell you.

Because you are afraid of you, you are afraid of affecting your work, you don't want you to rush over to see me.

I supported it alone in the rental house for several days, thinking that I could carry it by myself.

However, I later learned that many things can be spent.

One night, I sent a circle of friends consciously, and after a while, I heard a few friends prying my room lock in my dumplings.

I was scolded by them while having a needle in the hospital.

The content is probably--

You don't want others to worry about you, it's actually selfish. Because you rejected their "I willing" without authorization.

Fortunately, the circle of friends who consciously blurred saved me.

Before that, I always felt that I couldn't cry or hold it like a child.

After all, I am already a mature adult. If you want to report wells, do not worry about it, you must be able to hide things, and to carry things.

But then I realized that maturity is not to say how sad, but know how to reveal my fragility.

It's like ... uh, just like illness.

Either my illness, my elder brother's illness. If I have been dragging, I will suddenly break out one day.

You have to tell your friends, tell your family, go out, go to the hospital, and tell the doctor, "I'm uncomfortable."

You have the opportunity to get better.

I said a lot, you didn't look at me or answered me.

But I know, you listened to it.

You obediently took the first bath in three days and filled the phone with electricity.

Before going to bed, I received a screenshot of the article you sent to me.

The screenshot is "What is the most afraid of people who belong to pigs".I gave you a hug expression, you said good night.

Good night, dad.

- END -