Real self -discipline, do not rely on willpower

These days, a game called "Sheep has a sheep" popular all over the entire network.

A casual game similar to eliminating fun is extremely simple, but it is extremely difficult to pass the level. Many people have played dozens of times or hundreds of times in order to pass the second level.

Some people call it "new drugs" on the mobile phone. The second level cannot sleep before. Some people say that it is the standard for inspecting the "donkey" of the circle of friends. Only "Donkey" will persevere "a sheep with a sheep."

There will be a small game with screen swiping every time, which looks simple, but it is to make countless people "up", and it is difficult to extricate themselves.

Driven the last one to play the last one, one after another, and after a few hours, it passed.

Why do everyone know that "self -discipline makes people free", but always cannot control themselves in front of games, videos, and food?

Is the willpower too poor?

We often think that self -discipline relies on managing our own willpower and strong willpower, and you can do many things that others cannot do; if the willpower is weak, it is easy to be tempted by the game and give up self -discipline.

The book "Willpower Trap" believes that this is precisely why many people cannot be self -disciplined, and willpower is not used.

Benjamin Hadi | Zhejiang Education Press

Frankly speaking, how many times did you try to change your life, but you start again? How many times do you want to change a bad habit, but return to the old model?

We have set a grand goal for ourselves, but we find that no matter how desperate work, you are far from the goal.

After many failures, you come to this conclusion that you have not achieved the quality of the goal -courage, inner strength and willpower.

Is this really true?

Taking weight management as an example, more and more people around us are working hard to lose weight. People spend billions of dollars in fashion, diet and fitness, but the average weight of the global population is still increasing.

Health experts predict that by 2025, more than 50%of people on the earth will become overweight or obese.

Why are people working hard and gain more?

One explanation is that genes, personality, lack of willpower, and bad habits are not the cause of obesity increase, and the environmental changes are sharp.

From the end of the 19th century to the beginning of the 20th century, the world began to industrialize rapidly, which caused a large number of people to leave the countryside into the city.

In the past 100 years, more and more people have started working indoors, usually sitting work instead of working outdoors. Most people do not eat local food, but eat packaged foods.

The information revolution that has occurred in recent decades has changed the environment of our lives again. It is easier for us to indulge in all kinds of hobbies, such as video games, technology products, and coffee, a large amount of carbohydrates, and can be quickly absorbed. Food and so on.

And these addictive behaviors are mutually encouraging. Staying up late, games, videos, caffeine, junk food, you are obsessed with one, it is easy to get over other, and eventually leads to us in a state of lack of sleep, stress, and overweight. Essence

We tried to force ourselves to stop with will and change these bad habits, but the result is exactly the opposite.

The willpower is gone when you wake up from your sleep and the moment you pick up your phone; when you are bombed by thousands of choices, your willpower is gone ...

It is impossible to change in a way to force yourself.

Psychology believes that willpower is a limited renewable energy source, and it will gradually be exhausted with use.

Therefore, when your hard day is over, your willpower has been exhausted, leaving only a naked, unprepared self, and no control to stop eating nights and grinding time.

People are the product of the environment. Compared with the desire and willpower deep in your heart, the environment of the environment is more powerful, and it can also control your behavior.

We can scream loudly at the festival, but it cannot be on the plane; wearing shoes in some people is acceptable, but it is not acceptable to others ...

There are rules for each environment, and they shape people's behavior and attitude in the environment.

The book is an example. At a young age, his parents divorced when he was very young. He mainly lived with his mother and met his father every weekend.

When he got along with his mother, he was obedient and only ate healthy food prescribed by his mother; when he got along with his father, he became naive, immature, willful, and had no self -control, just like he returned to himself at the age of five or six.

There is also a case in "Mirror Thinking".

Fiona transferred to a new school when he was 13 years old.

In the previous schools, everyone was diligent and proud of the grades, while the new schools were different. Children did not like to learn, and naughty students were more popular.

In a biological class shortly after her transfer, the biological teacher said: "Except for Fiona's homework well, the classmates have not completed their homework."

At this time, the classmates looked at her.

And Fiona didn't feel the slightest. On the contrary, she felt embarrassed and self -contained.

In an environment that everyone does not like to learn, students who love to learn will be labeled "false serious", "nerd", "different from us".

In order to integrate into the new collective, Fiona has changed all her previous habits. She no longer cares about whether she can get excellent results, and only pay attention to how many homework can be checked.

Soon after, she didn't have that kind of incompatible feeling, and she made a piece with friends from new schools. This incident made Fiona realize that the price paid for the new environment is his own academic and future, and the impact of the environment is slow and silent. You may not realize that changes have already happened.

So, how to improve your environment and control willpower?

Sociologist Abraham Maslow created a concept called "Peak Experience". He called it a "rare, marine, deep and touching, exciting and exciting experience."

You will feel that all your basic needs are met, and you can also dig out your highest potential as a person.

Many people have an experience. When traveling, walk into a novel environment, or in a state of completely relaxing, you will have a lot of creative inspiration and ideas. You will think of what kind of life you want, you will see a lot The essence of things.

After having a "peak experience", you will look at yourself and the world in a new way, knowing what you want.

The peak experience can be created actively.

The most successful person in the world will consciously leave time in their daily plans to get rid of daily life, charging, and resetting. Bill Gates will use "thinking week" to allow themselves to stay away from work and various forms of communication. Essence

You may not have a whole week to rest and recover, however, you can start to arrange "disconnecting day" to give yourself a whole day to rest and recover.

During this time, leave your daily environment and take time to think, relax, learn, and write diary.

In a relaxed state, write down the ideals you want to achieve, and the key changes you have to make, and write down everything you want.

With a clear goal, you will know how to change your daily environment and achieve your goal.

At least one day of "technology fasting" every day, do not view smartphones or surf the Internet, stay away from non -healthy foods, and re -establish contact with the people you love;

Looking back on your experience every week, what is the place you do, the place you do well, the unsuccessful place, what is the plan next week;

Every morning, I write a diary of the morning to set a framework for the things you really want to do that day, instead of starting from turning on the phone and passively starting a new day ...

The environment is shaping people, but people are not slaves to the environment. You have the ability to improve the small environment around yourself and have the ability to control your life.

Author | Covenant, write a good story of others, and live a good life.

Picture | Visual China, the Internet (if there is any infringement, please contact delete)

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