In the digital age, how to make intergeneration more smooth

Hainan Overseas Chinese Middle School high school test sites, candidates walked out of the examination room to take a photo with their families. Su Shikun Photo/Light Picture

In Nanjing, Jiangsu, parents are understanding the enrollment information of universities. Suyang Photo/Guangming Picture

In Huzhou, Zhejiang, an old man celebrated Mother's Day with his family. Yao Haixiang Photo/Guangming Picture

In Luzhou, Anhui, his family took the child to play with the young. Liu Qinli Photo/Guangming Picture

In Neijiang, Sichuan, parents helped their children in the corner of the blind date to find a "person". Tang Mingrun Photo/Bright Picture

Editor

During the transition period, family relationships, intergenerational relations, often the focus of public attention. Under the "spotlight" of the new media, intergenerational differences and conflicts have been enlarged infinitely. Intergenerational relations are the epitome of social relations. At the moment of the rapid economic and social development, attention to intergenerational relations is conducive to promoting the mutual understanding of each group and promoting social harmony. What different cognition and views do you have in family, society, culture and other aspects of younger generations? What are the prominent characteristics of intergenerational relationships now? What are the deep reasons behind? Digitalized, what possibilities do you provide for intergenerational communication? Our reporter conducted an in -depth investigation.

What major to choose in college? After graduating, stay in a big city or go back to his hometown? When will you be married? Scientific parenting or experience? Do you like the network circle you like? Will you open the health information reposted by the elders?

These problems that are scattered in everyone's life are not easy to deal with. The emotional maintenance of a family and even two groups involves the harmony and harmony of the entire society.

Intergenerational relations refer to the relationship between the two generations or many generations in the process of social development. People of different ages have the complexity of cooperation and conflict, unity, and alienation due to the differences in social situations and cultural concepts. With the development of economy and society, the improvement of family living standards, and the widespread application of Internet technology, intergenerational conflicts have frequently appeared in multiple levels of real life and the Internet world.

1. Reality and network interweaving, intergenerational relations present new features

1. The choice of reality, there are differences between the two generations

Learning, work, life ... involving personal growth and development, family members are used to discussing together to "get ideas". But many times, communication is not so smooth.

Study, employment, who listen to. "My dad is a middle school teacher. Since elementary school, I have been tutoring in the winter and summer vacations. I rarely go out to play. After entering the college, my parents urged me to quickly prepare for the postgraduate entrance examination. The relationship with them has always been stiff. "Xiaogao, 26, frankly, his parents blindly pursuing achievements and high -intensity management, which once led to great psychological pressure and even having a scholarship.

Xiao Gao's experience is not an example. Many young people said that parents like to control their lives. Xiao Qiu graduated from a well -known college and has not let his parents worried in his studies. When looking for a job, she did not obey her parents' persuasion, but entered a cultural communication company for new media planning. "I like novel and interesting jobs. Let me sit in the office every day and step by step." But every time I go home on vacation, my parents always talk about the children of a certain relative and enter the civil servant or enter the public institution. "".

"After cultivating children for so many years, I have not found a stable job or entered a large company. I always feel unsatisfactory and worry about her suffering in the future. Talking with relatives and friends, there is still a little face." In recent years, the rise of new formats has risen, many of them have risen. After the 90s, we started online anchors, short video UP mains, copywriting planning, etc. These options were difficult to be accepted and understood by older generations.

Different from the view of marriage and fertility plagues the two generations. "As long as I call with my mother, she always urged me to find a object so that I would get married before the age of 30. At present, in order to urge her to get married, her mother lived in where Ms. Hou lived for more than half a year last year: "She thinks I don't worry about her affairs, we quarreled several times, she was angry back, and I did not go back to her hometown. New Year. "

There are more young people who choose late marriage and unmarried, which makes it difficult to understand the older generation. In the interview, "Thirty -year -old" is a frequent age. Many parents hope that their children can get married before and live a stable family life earlier. Ms. Li, who has retired, said, "I don't expect how much achievements in their children have achieved, I just hope he can get married earlier. But as long as you mention this, he hangs up the phone two sentences." Many people adopt language supervision and arrange blind date. In other ways, try to convey the traditional marriage attitude to children, but the effect is not ideal.

In addition to the different views of marriage and love, fertility choices have also become a topic that can easily cause quarrels between generations. "The work pressure is high, I can't care about it, I really don't have spared no effort to raise children." "We gave birth to two children at that time, not so big? And not as strenuous now." The conflict caused by marriage and fertility allows the family The tenderness was diluted, and the intergeneration caused new troubles.

How to raise children caused inconsistent opinions. "The doctor told me that children love to sweat, and they need to increase or decrease their clothes in a timely manner. But the elderly are always worried about the child's cold and give the three layers of three layers in the bag. For this reason, we have no quarrel." Ms. Zhou, 34, often because of young children The details of care have argued with their parents.

"Whether it is full, or feeding in moderation" "Is it a regular schedule or a trapped naturally?" The concept of breeding is different, becoming a major content of intergenerational conflicts. The older generation often continues the tradition of personal parenting, more experienced; the younger generation is good at acquiring knowledge from the Internet and learning the concept of modern raising. Parenting, or scientific parenting, the conceptual and poor communication caused by this, which caused conflicts between the two generations. 2. Intergeneration conflicts have spread from reality to the network

As the digital process accelerates, all ages have the way and methods of Internet expression, and intergenerational conflicts in daily life gradually spread to online. "The development of new media has made generation conflicts more convenient to present the platform, and some of the original hidden issues have been publicized." Said Wu Xiaoyan, an associate professor at the Department of Social Work of the Chinese Academy of Political Science. Due to the anonymous characteristics of the network and strong emotional appeal, some ordinary topic discussions have also been rendered into intergenerational conflicts of two groups.

The network behavior preferences of the two generations are different. "My parents are easy to make a fuss. Sometimes they send some personal emotions in the circle of friends. They immediately called and asked if I had happened recently. In order to avoid misunderstandings, they could only block them." The younger generation likes to socialize in socializing The media shared personal life dynamics. Because of worrying that the elders did not recognize their own lifestyle, many people chose "shielding" or "pulling black" elders. The older generation prefers to change healthy health, "soul chicken soup" articles, but this kind of information is regarded by the younger generation as redundant and burden, lest she avoid it.

Different the topics of intergenerational concerns not only increase the possibility of misunderstanding, but also reduce the frequency of communication. Several elders reported: "Send a message to the child, he generally responds to a" good '', and he rarely tells us. "" Daughter usually calls once a week and ask how our body is. What she said was more perfunctory, and we didn't ask much about it. "

Web communication occurs. "In the family WeChat group, I rumored the health rumors reposted by the elders. Instead of trusting me, they moved me out of the group chat, and then continued to forward the rumors. People crying and laughing." Some young netizens said that the elders said to themselves to themselves. The persuasion is very exclusive, "I always feel that my loved ones will harm him."

Ms. Song, who had just learned to use smartphones for a long time, said, "Sometimes I encounter something that I can't know. I want to ask the child. He is a little impatient and says that we don't understand anything. Don't mess up on the Internet. "Many older generations are more willing to help friends of the same age, or believe in the sharing of information of strange netizens, and have a barriers to communicate and communicate with information between generations.

The younger generation will be dissatisfied to the Internet. "How to adjust the mentality after being scolded by my parents" "Parents always suppress me, and I become more and more silent" ... There are more than 12,000 members of Douban's "Native Family Fighting Society" group, and they talk or reflect on the relationship with my parents.

Every holiday, a large number of discussions on social media about "how to talk to relatives" and "how to fight with the" Diaoling 'Elders' "fighting brave", which has resonated with many young netizens. Such topics are often reposted and commented on a large number of topics. Essence

Young groups such as "post -90s" and "post -00s" have long been infiltrated in the Internet for a long time, and have more technical and information advantages than elders. At the same time, the users of social media are mainly young people, and they are more negatively impressed by the online group of the elderly. The elderly have become the "vulnerable group" of digital space and lack the consciousness and channels of vocalization.

2. The multi -dimensional cause behind intergenerational conflicts is worthy of attention

Different understanding of intergenerational relations. "We don't understand the work of the child. I am worried that he is not doing well. Every time I want to inquire, I am annoyed without saying a few words." "Every time I go home, I can't get hot for three days. From learning and work, none of them are satisfied with them. "Looking forward to understanding and looking forward to understanding, just like the two sides of a coin, reflecting the different views of the two generations of intergenerational relations. Liu Wenrong, a researcher at the Sociology Research Institute of Shanghai Academy of Social Sciences, believes that the differences in the life cycle, era experience, and position views owned by the younger generation and older generations make the intergenerational relations may have a conflict.

The younger generation grew up in the era of abundant material material. At the same time as "filial piety" to the elders, he also hoped that there was an equal intergenerational relationship, such as mutual respect and understanding in value concepts and lifestyle. Based on this, Communicate and communicate instead of blindly "Shun". However, many long -term generations often regard children as the continuation of their own value, and design children's learning, work or life from their own perspective. After the child is an adult, he is still reluctant to give up the responsibility of education and guidance, trying to continue to restrict or control your children. One party is "winged and flying", and the other party is still "grasping and not letting go". It is difficult to avoid communication and even conflict.

The intergenerational boundaries are unclear, and they are involved too much. "Buying a house is a down payment from the parents. Sometimes it costs a lot to turn on hand, and parents will give me money." Many children still need parents to give their parents for economic and life care after work. " Old "" intergenerational dependence "exists in large quantities. In addition, the elderly generation participated in the younger generation of young children. The elderly sacrificed their retirement life to help take care of their children and the next generation. The boundaries of economy and life are unclear and excessive, so that the two generations are not easy to grasp the size and scale when they get along, and it is easy to produce excessive protection and excessive interference. Economy and life are not independent, making the emotional relationship between children and parents complicated. "In psychology, there is a concept called self -differentiation, which is used to measure the degree of emotional separation of children and parents. Self -differentiation is relatively good. Normal family relationships can also get along with each other. On the contrary, intergenerational relations will repeatedly sway between control and escape. "Wu Xiaoyan said.

The changes in the times have differentiated social concepts. With the acceleration of society's transformation, different generations of "big events" such as marriage and career show a different understanding of court. Taking marriage as an example, in the perspective of older generations, marriage is an important social norm, which includes multiple symbolic significance such as living security, future generations, and moral transmission. If the children are married or not, the entire family will face the pressure of public opinion. From the perspective of the younger generation, the individual significance of marriage is higher than that of social significance. They pay attention to personal emotional experience and believe that "this is their own business, have nothing to do with others", and is more cautious about marriage choices. In the case of different concepts and different sense of meaning, intergenerational communication is easy to become "self -talk", or tit -for -tat. The discussion on these topics also implies the contest of two generations of social discourse.

The deviation of cultural resources has led to the collision of intergenerational culture. The younger generation has obtained cultural resources from the vast Internet, becoming the main cultural consumption subject, and constructing a series of cultural context and discourse symbols. Most of the elderly generations facing the rapid development and cultural changes of society can only be passively adapt. In cultural collisions, intergenerational dialogue space and the meaningful content of the significant meaning are compressed.

As a digital aboriginal, the younger generation has developed various types of online subcultures, such as the "two -dimensional" culture, "fan" culture, "spoof" culture, etc., which generally have entertainment and certain criticalness. The older generation is relatively traditional and conservative in terms of cultural selection, and it is difficult to adapt or accept online sub -culture. For example, some young people regard the "funeral" culture as an expression of emotional vent, but they are reprimanded by the elders, thinking that they are negative and non -mainstream. "I just changed a spoof or a little 'lost', my parents would think that my mentality was not sunny, and it was useless to explain. Later, I was too lazy to say it." In this context, young people chose to be in the Asian cultural circle. Seeking resonance and comfort, deliberately clearing the cultural boundaries, so that the cultural circles of generations are more closed.

Internet algorithm recommendation and "traffic" logic, catalyzed and enlarged intergenerational conflicts. In the new media environment, the algorithm recommendation mechanism has personalized propagation of users. Due to the differences in education level and interest preferences between the two generations, the information received is different. The differentiated information environment has made the intergenerational sharing information less and less, increasing the difficulty of interaction between the two groups, and their respective "information cocoons" are becoming more stable.

In addition, some platforms and accounts deliberately create a topic of conflict, label to intergenerational relationships, etc., to "attract gold" with "eye -catching". They will make some news about the elderly or young people, by intentionally distorting narratives and exaggerating rhetoric, to create intergenerational false conflicts, so as to harvest "traffic" commodity. For example, some self -media accounts selectively ignore positive news about the elderly, deliberately highlight the incidents of the small part of the elderly violated the social morality, and use the exciting words during the spread to create the "title party" and fake news to create the audience to make the audience. The stereotype of "Old Bear" has led to the "abstract and anger" of the younger generation of the younger generation, which in turn causes irrational emotional expression.

3. Digitalization to open intergenerational relationships to provide platforms and possibilities

On August 31, the China Internet Information Center released the 50th "Statistical Report of the Development of China's Internet Network". As of June 2022, the scale of netizens in my country was 1.051 billion, and the proportion of netizens using mobile phones to access the Internet was 99.6%. The Internet has become an important public discourse space, which provides new platforms for intergenerational communication and dialogue, showing new possibilities for intergenerational interaction.

Promote the establishment of friendly intergeneration. The implementation of the "Family Education Promotion Law" provides strong support for improving the harmonious family relationship, and the policy should be further implemented. Liu Wenrong called for further research on intergenerational relationships and family relations, and promoted the establishment of friendly intergenerational relations from the perspective of social development. Strengthen the popularity of psychological education and psychology, so that individuals can better understand the differences with other groups, and be able to actively treat and handle intergenerational relations. Cultivate more public welfare service organizations, carry out psychological counseling services for people in need, and relationship communication and mediation. Wu Xiaoyan suggested that both young and older generations should improve communication skills and intergenerational processing capabilities. Emotionally, learn to be empathy and settle for each other; in terms of behavior, improve independence and autonomy, and maintain appropriate boundaries. In this way, it can not only harvest warm and safe intimate relationships, but also respect each other in terms of values ​​and lifestyles to reduce intergenerational generations conflict. Give full play to the social cohesion of excellent traditional culture. The Internet and artificial intelligence technology provides new paths for the inheritance and development of excellent traditional culture, and also open up new space for the cultural integration of different groups. In recent years, a large number of programs that promote outstanding traditional culture have been broadcast on multiple platforms, which has caused the younger generation to sought up and heated. It is necessary to further innovate the integration of traditional culture, allow more young immersive experiences, internalize excellent traditions into their own way of behavior, and provide "cultural community" for intergenerational dialogue and communication.

The main body of the society is alive, and the "digital gap" is brought to the way to expand the room for dialogue. With the continuous expansion of social media user groups, the humorous "emoticons" and playful buzzwords have also become popular in the older generation. Many people are interested in this and actively learn and use. However, many elderly people still have difficulties and panic, and they should help them change their mindset and cognitive bias to adapt to digital life. It should take into account the needs of all groups of society, increase the tolerance of digital products and service design, and focus on the transformation of aging. In terms of skills, carry out digital skills training to help the elderly generation improvement of digital products' proficiency and frequency of use. In terms of literacy, they improve their identification of online rumors, false information, and online fraud, and promote the integration of social integration of elderly groups.

Promote "cultural feeding" and build a platform for communication. Pay attention to "cultural feeding" in an important role in eliminating the intergenerational conflict. Building online and offline is conducive to intergenerational interaction and communication. On the online side, encourage Internet companies to develop forums, community groups, applications, etc., build digital platforms for intergenerational communication, and allow the two generations to "have some chats" and "talk". Offline, youth and elderly group organizations, communities, etc. can hold activities regularly and open small and micro classrooms with emotional communication. At the same time, encourage the younger generation to "feed" the older generation in culture and technology, and launch the "silver age" to launch the "silver age" Volunteers provide consultation and services to young people in terms of employment, marriage and other aspects, allowing the two generations to inspire recognition and resonance in a way of helping each other.

Strengthen network supervision and deal with the acts of "harvesting" intergenerational conflicts. Some networks "keyboard man" deliberately increased individual contradictions into intergenerational conflicts, and some platforms and self -media accounts were to attract over -rendering inter -intergenerational conflicts. Such behaviors were concealed , Can't let it spread, destroy a healthy network ecology. Institute of supervision and punishment should be strengthened to create a good public opinion environment for the intergenerational dialogue of digital space.

(Reporter Ma Shanshan)

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