In the story of the "Er", there is the secret to walking out of the mental internal consumption

New Yellow River Reporter: Zheng Chuqiao

Today, "Eryi" was screened. In a 11 -minute video, the UP master "Yigo conjecture" tells his life experience. Netizens said that the video was "great", and many people said that they were cured. Just like the author's self -report, "the limbs are sound, go to college, and then born in an era full of opportunities. It should have a fuller life than Erji." This is why the author believes that his "mental internal consumption" is cured.

The "mental internal consumption" in many netizens has attracted attention again.

What is mental internal consumption?

Have you ever had such an experience: I didn't do anything for a day, but I often feel psychological tiredness--

For example, if you care too much about the evaluation of others, repeatedly struggle with the opinions of others, the lower you want to feel the lower ...

For example, in the face of better colleagues, the psychology will be very unbalanced, and then put more pressure on yourself ...

For example, if one thing is not done well, I feel that I am very failed, and there is nothing ...

The pull of this kind of thought is consuming the spirit like consuming physical strength, so this tiredness is not physical, but mentally mentally.

How to get out of mental internal consumption? In the story of "Er", there is a secret to getting out of the mental internal consumption.

1. Learn to accept ordinary self

The mental consumer usually has high expectations for themselves and strives to be perfected. Once you can't do it as you wish, you will fall into an internal consumption state. In fact, perfectionism is often the biggest obstacle of "from 0 to 1". We must remember that completion is more important than perfect!

how should I do it?

First do not give yourself too much preset. One thing began to execute is a kind of success. In the process of execution, slowly adjust and optimize, first and then difficult, from 60 points a little bit to 80 points, 90 points, do not pursue 100 points.

Don't suggest that "others can do it and I can do it" anymore, and accept "I can't do".

Just go all out, even if it is unsuccessful, it doesn't matter. Finding the deficiencies is victory.

2. Learn to separate "yourself" from "others"

In "The Bad Courage", the psychologist Adler proposes a concept: the topic is separated.

In big vernacular, it is to distinguish what other people are, what is their own business, what is the emotions of others, and what is their own emotions.

For example, how you do one thing is your business, regardless of right or wrong, it is enough to bear the consequences by yourself; others' ideas are other people's affairs. You don't need to do it according to the idea of ​​TA view.

3. It is enough to do what you can control

In "The Seven Habits of Efficient People", Dr. Stephenkevovi proposed the concept of influence, attention, and control circles.

The control circle is something we can directly control, such as our thoughts, language, behavior, and so on. The influence circle is what we can influence through our own words and deeds, such as the views of others, the results of things, and so on. Following the circle is something we care about, but we can't afford it for the time being.

For example, eccentric bosses, incompetent subordinates, unreasonable systems ... We cannot control these things. If we pay too much attention to these, we will only become irritable.

But those people who are efficient pay more attention to things that they can control and influence, do these things to improve themselves, thereby expanding the scope that they can control and influence.

4. Reverse the faith and not entangle the past

Psychologist Elis has a famous emotional ABC theory, A refers to facts, C finger feelings, and B is belief.

That is, what kind of feeling does not depend on the facts itself, but on your belief.

For example, the failure of a mission was scolded by the boss, and some people may feel that the future is probably exhausted in the leader. But in fact, this is just your belief, not the idea of ​​leadership. Because a work fails, it does not necessarily lead to hopeless promotion. In fact, you can do it well in the future, and you will add points.

Therefore, constantly regret what has happened, it will only make yourself in internal consumption. It is better to try to change his belief and focus on the future.

Shi Tiesheng wrote in an article:

God has never given anyone "the happiest" word of "the happiest". He sets an eternal distance in front of everyone's desire and gives everyone a limited limit. If you can't understand happiness on the endless road that beyond the self -limitation, then Shi Tiesheng's cannot run with Lewis and cannot run faster, which is the root cause of depression and pain.

Edit: Weekend

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