When I heard me say, "It's much better," the consultant should be happy

Today's article is shared from a "dual identity".

Amy is both a consultant and a visitor.

Here, she analyzed the reasons why people like to lie to the consultant, and the benefits of "telling the truth".

I hope this article can help you reduce your concerns about your performance and maximize the effect of consultation.

At the end of this article, we also set up the entrance to the "psychological medical examination" service. If you also want to find a suitable consultant and grow up with professionals, maybe, our "psychological physical examination" service can quickly help you.

If you are willing to try, you can pull down articles to enter the service.

You should never lie to the four kinds of people-your doctor, your accountant, your lawyer, and your consultant. You pay for these professionals for their professional knowledge. If they don't know all the stories, they will not help you.

But as a consultant, I know that many people don't tell me the truth. As a person with my own consultant, I also understand why lying is very attractive.

01

How many people lie to their consultants?

Most people are lying to their consultants, which is not just based on my personal experience as evidence. Researchers found that most people were honest when they were sitting on the sofa of the consultant.

In a survey conducted by the American Psychological Society in 2015, 93%of the respondents said they had lied at least once during the treatment.

The scope of lies may be from "I have to cancel the appointment because I am sick" to "no, I don't use any drugs."

Lies may also include "part of the truth". For example, some people may tell the consultant to quarrel with their spouses, but they did not mention that they had a temper and said that they were hurt.

02

The reason why people lie to the consultant

If you lied to your consultant, you might feel blame because of dishonesty. However, you may be hard to be honest because of some potential reasons. Therefore, there are some reasons why the whole truth is difficult here.

1. Self -protection

Some people accept the consultation because others want them to do so, such as partners or laws of compulsory law. Therefore, they may not intend to really invest in making changes.

Their purpose may be to avoid the consequences of the truth. For example, those who are mandatory by the court may soon say: drug tests are not allowed! I have never used any drugs for a long time. Because admitting that the use of drugs may cause people who are in probation periods.

Therefore, it makes sense for some people to lie, because they want to maintain the status quo and they don't want to make any changes.

2. Escape from uncomfortable emotions

Most people consult to solve some sensitive problems, and talking about specific topics may make people feel quite uncomfortable. Therefore, some people may doubt whether what happened in childhood or whether it is important to cause sexual desire, and talk about these things that may make people feel too painful.

Avoid talking about being hurt or bad for others, you may feel more comfortable. Talking about it may arouse a lot of shame, embarrassment or sadness.

3. I want to get the consultant's likes

It is normal to be liked to be liked by others, and it is no exception to your consultant.

Some people may worry that if they admit their mistakes, the consultant will judge them. Or they may worry, because they tell a story of their own temper, and the consultant will think they are a bad guy or lunatic. Therefore, they may feel that it is safer to show things that make them look good.

4. Afraid of making the consultant feel sad

Sometimes people lie because they don't want the consultant to feel uncomfortable. "I don't like your homework for my family" or "I don't agree with what you say".

Those who please others may also lie to their improvement. For example, they may tell the consultants that they feel much better, so that the consultant will not feel sad because their consultation is not effective.

03

Get up the courage to tell the truth

Your relationship with the consultant is likely to imitate your relationship outside the consultation room. For example, do you avoid confrontation with others? Do you pay more attention to please others rather than establish a sincere connection? Do you treat the feelings of others as your responsibility?

Just looking at your behavior in the consulting room, you can understand yourself to a large extent. But it is important that consultation should be regarded as a security zone that changes your interaction between you and the surroundings.

When you have the courage to meet your consultant frankly, you will take a big step in the direction of self -healing. When you see your consultant still accept you in the fact that you say some difficult facts, this will help to change the way you establish a relationship with others in the future.

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This article compiles, the original link:

https://www.verywellmind.com/why-most-eople-lie- their-dherapist-nd-why-you-the-the-the-the-5188552

Author: Amy Morin

Compilation: Simple psychological fangzhou

Image source: pinterest

Responsible editor: YY, Jane

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