Sensitive, lonely, perfectionism?This may be your unique "talent"
Author:Simple psychology Time:2022.07.22
Strong emotional response and sensitive to external stimuli? I often feel incompatible with the world? Is it a perfectionist by the people around you?
Perhaps you are a talented person.
Psychological counseling for "Gifted Adults" is an emerging field. Many traditional trained psychological health services also don't know much about it.
Energetic and talented people have huge potential, but they are also prone to crisis of emotional and interpersonal relationships.
Without the correct guidance and support, they are likely to have no way to give full play to their entire potential.
If you are such a person and you feel troubled for this, you can ask yourself the following questions:
强 Are you a strong and highly sensitive person?
学习 Are you a fast learner?
这个 Do you often feel incompatible with this world?
到 Are you easy to be excited? Will your creative inspiration make it difficult for you to fall asleep?
收 Will you "absorb" too much feelings and energy of others, so that the crowd and social environment you are located makes you feel a little overload?
极 Will you set a high standard for yourself? Will you be regarded by the people around you as the perfectionist? Will you challenge authority?
自 Do you have a strong self -driving force and the needs of independent work?
间 Will you feel frustrated because you have witnessed the unfairness or degeneration of the world? Do you feel struggling when you endure the indifference and ignorance of the world?
展 Do you show your achievements and abilities low -key and make yourself look "ordinary" to avoid the attack of others?
If you resonate with some of the above problems, although you don't know, you are likely to be a "talented person."
What kind of person is "talented adults"?
The answer may not be what you imagine.
When you see the word "gifted", your response may be fear of heart, it may be a very important concept for you.
Because in the traditional definition, "Giftedness" is limited to measuring IQ (IQ), or to describe people's achievements in traditional talents such as music or sports.
However, the existence of extraordinary talents and talents in reality is not involved in traditional concepts.
For example, many talented people have high -level talents in interpersonal, inner and spiritual levels.
01
Trauma
From small to large, these "Extraordinarily Intense" may bring you many invisible harm to you.
You may be labeled with "talented", but this does not mean that you get a suitable understanding and support in the process of looking for your own life path.
In this long -term struggle, few people can conform to the speed of your thinking, emotional strength and spiritual intuition.
Even when you are a child, you are already an "old soul".
You will ask some profound and complicated questions that even the surrounding adults cannot answer.
You care about the issues of existentialism, such as death and life.
You are very concerned about global problems and environmental problems, but few people around you can share your thoughts with you.
Some people even look at you with contempt or confusion, or disdain you because of your innocence.
Your home may not be your shelter.
The high sensitivity and strong empathy you have, which may depend on you, see you as an emotional confidant and partner, not a child.
In other words, you are "parentify", that is, the role of the parents and the child is adjusted.
Even if no one wants to hurt you, your natural talent and intuition may take you to take the initiative to take the role of people around you to reduce pain and solve problems.
Gifted Trauma brought by your "talent" will not disappear with your adults.
If it still does not heal or is dealt with, it may be manifested as the following self -destructive emotions and behaviors::
1. Sex depression
Talent people are prone to existing depression.
Those who have sex depression will see the difference between the ideal situation and reality.
Your despair comes not only to see the unfairness, functional disorders, and hypocrisy of the world, but also from the indifference and ignorance of others.
You may imagine things that should be, but the people around you will not understand you, which will make you live in loneliness for a long time.
2. Low achievement
In social networking, in order to avoid being jealous, attacked, and misunderstood, you will constantly adjust yourself.
When you are young, adults in life may deliberately describe your achievements and create a so -called "fair competition environment".
When the people around you are challenged and threatened by the questions you ask, they may keep you silent.
However, unknowingly, you will be internalized into an inherent setting by your experience.
Therefore, you will silently hide your creative ideas, dilute your achievements, or suppress your voice to ensure that others feel comfortable. Even if you want to stand up to show your talent, it is difficult for you to do it.
You may refuse an opportunity to work, avoid an intimate relationship, or feel extreme anxiety in social.
3. Follow the crisis brought by the rules
The speed and depth you think and the complexity of your inner world will make it difficult for you to integrate into the traditional life trajectory of mainstream society.
And you may be forced to accept the gender character in the stereotype, or you are forced to choose a career choice that does not meet your inner nature.
In order to adapt to society, you will choose to cover up your true self. You may experience a serious crisis at a middle -aged or one -quarter stage, or you may face depression or severe illness in your later years.
4. I feel lonely
For talented people, finding sincere friends or close partners is often a challenge.
You will easily feel bored or lack of irritation, so it may be difficult for you to find someone who is the same frequently as you.
You need a lot of time to deal with your thoughts, and at the same time you will have strong independence and autonomy.
You may also find that it is difficult for you to meet a reasonable and romantic person.
However, when you really find a person who can trust and be together, your relationship is often deeper and lasting.
5. Full of empathy
You will tend to "absorb" the emotions and abilities of others, even if you don't want to do so.
This makes you feel overwhelmed or exhausted in social and crowd.
You may also bring the emotions of "absorption" from others into yourself, and mistakenly think it is your emotions.
Therefore, you will feel "too sensitive".
6. Delays
For talented people, perfectionism is often their common feature.
This will cause you to procrastinate or break the original plan.
If what you do makes you not interested, you will also delay your task because he cannot tolerate the boredom of the task.
7. Inspirational obstruction
The reason why you feel the obstacle may be due to: negative self -doubts, excessive self -criticism, and fear of failure.
You may need to help you feel comfortable in your heart through practice and self -cognition.
It will not make you feel exhausted nor boring, excessive consumption or no freshness.
8. Anti -name replacement syndrome
Do you often feel that you don't deserve any honor given to you, as if you live in a hypocritical world?
Talented people tend to over -examine themselves, focus on their own defects and improve themselves.
There are often differences between "how do you view yourself" and "How to view you".
The talent fraudulence is called an analog replacement syndrome.
If people try to degrade your achievements in all your life, then it will be difficult for you to internalize your achievements into a self -confidence of yourself, so that it will make you more likely to have vicious self -doubts.
02
Psychological counseling for talented people
1. Does your consultant have experience in working with talented people in the past?
Because talented people only account for five percent of about 5 %, there are few research on such people so far.
Many talented people are repeatedly misdiagnosed or labeled after trauma stress disorders, bipolar emotional disorders, polymidians, or marginal personality disorders.
Therefore, whether the consultant who works with you can carefully understand the challenges you experience, rather than the label or classification of resort to resort, it becomes very important.
The ideal situation is that your consultant has knowledge or experience in specific dilemma and contradiction -related fields.
For example, some common issues:
诚 About the pull between freedom and loyalty
属 The pull between the sense of true and the sense of belonging
"Survivor Guilt" about you is more smart than others
原 The guilt psychology produced by the native family that leaves functional disorders.
2. Can your consultant keep up with you?
You have the idea of rapid reaction, complexity, and jumping, which enables you to be competent with imaginative and abstract thinking.
When you deal with a situation, you will think from both wisdom and philosophy at the same time.
The nature you question will make the consultant's work challenging, because you will not just look at the surface of the matter, you will want to challenge those seemingly unreasonable things.
Therefore, you will want a person with a healthy self -esteem to help you. This person will not think that you are a challenge or be frightened by you.
You will want to know whether the person in front of you has an open mind when you expose your heart to accept your thoughts, understand your humor, and keep up with your speed.
A qualified consultant is to be able to accept and support the "talented" intuition, perception, and ideas you have.
They will encourage you to speak and think in your most natural and comfortable way.
If you feel your consultant project your own insecurity to you, you may discover from it, and the family atmosphere appears in the consultation relationship.
In this relationship, you will want to take care of their feelings and protect them.
If this model is not resolved, it may cause trauma to you again and eventually hinder your progress and growth.
3. Is your consultant a flexible and flexible person?
As a person with strong thoughts, your emotional state may quickly change from the situation of chaos to a comprehensive crisis. When you start to step into the process of real self -healing, you may have a small moment of collapse due to strong thoughts and emotions.
At this stage, you will want a person who is relatively easy to get close and can work with you, and be able to consult with you more flexible or flexible.
Traditional psychological counseling models that are fixed once a week may not necessarily be suitable for you.
4. Can your consultant see your perseverance?
In the past life, you may be trying to hide the pain you feel.
You are too used to becoming a caregiver of others' emotions, so that you rarely expose your fragile side.
Given that you may be a highly accomplished person, no experienced consultants may think that you are "more segmented", and therefore ignore the pain, shame and trauma you bear.
Sadly, in this case, you will continue your previous model that avoid pain and anti -dependence, that is, solve everything yourself, never expect anyone.
If your consultant is unable to challenge your perseverance at the right time, you will continue to put a wall with a wall and cannot make progress.
03
Are you ready for help?
The distinctive or misunderstanding in your life has created a strong sense of separation and loneliness.
The "talent" trauma you experienced when you was a kid did not disappear yourself.
At the same time, as a high -sensitive person, you have a lot of energy to love and give it, and you have huge potential to wait for being used.
If you can find the right person to work together, if they can provide you with a valuable and healing relationship, in this relationship, you can grow up to the person you want to be.
Your consultant allows you to understand your past and the present, and provide you with practical steps to help you use your creative potential.
If you are also a "talented person", but are often troubled by your own "talent", maybe our "psychological physical examination" service can quickly help you.
The "psychological medical examination" service can help you answer the puzzles such as "Is my situation serious" and "Can I get better?" After the physical examination is completed, the consultant will provide you with a suitable set of psychological health solutions. Training and so on.
This time, starting from knowing myself and changing myself.
Psychological medical examination service is reduced to 129 yuan
Click the picture below for details 图片️
This article compiles, the original link:
https://www.psychologytody.com/intl/blog/living-Emotional-itensity/202008/gifted- adult- the-wounds-mi-intense
Author: IMI LO
Translator: simple psychological min
Picture source: Hyun mi 图片
Responsible editor: Bird Man, ying
▽ What is the psychological medical examination?
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