Former CCTV beauty anchor is rare in advance: Don't let the sense of boundaries, destroy your social relationship

1

Previously, the former CCTV beauty anchor Tu Jingwei rarely mentioned his predecessor on social platforms.

It turned out that there were fans who privately wrote to Jingwei and asked for a social problem: "I just broke up with a boyfriend who had been dating for 6 years. He said that although he still wanted to be friends, can the ex -predecessor really be friends?"

After reading the message, Tu Jingwei also felt that this problem had always been confused, because if he was worried that if he was a friend with his predecessor, would he hurt his current.

But after she thought seriously, she said: "Actually, I think it can be available."

Of course, there is a prerequisite. Tu Jingwei explained: If one of them has nothing to do, find the former to eat and chat together, there is no boundaries, it will definitely not be as close as before. Then the two can still be friends.

Tu Jingwei has shared himself after breaking up and found his predecessor. At that time, her mother was suddenly ill, and she wanted to find a reliable doctor to treat her mother.

There was a common friend between her and her ex -party, but she couldn't find the contact information of the doctor. She thought for a long time and decided to ask for help.

Later, her predecessor also found it for a long time, and finally gave her the phone number. For this matter, Tu Jingwei was grateful.

However, Tu Jingwei also said that she had encountered dinner with her boyfriend, but the other girlfriend of the other party suddenly called and wiped tears and crying on the side of the phone. Essence

In the final analysis, whether the predecessor can still be friends after the breakup, this mainly depends on the status of the two people and the boundaries when the two people get along.

Zhou Guoping once said:

"Everything has the final boundary that cannot be surpassed. This boundary is unclear, but it is certain. All troubles and conflicts start from unintentionally to break through this boundary."

I have to say that the sense of boundaries is an important factor that cannot be ignored in all social relations.

2

I have seen such a news on Weibo.

A takeaway of Xi'an took the meal to the customer's hands. When he was about to leave, the female customer asked him to help him pour the garbage, and Xiao Wang refused.

However, on the same day, Xiao Wang found that he was complained by the customer, because of "other takeaway brothers helped me to pour garbage, you will not fall, the attitude is so bad!"

After watching it, it is really sighing. It is love for helping to pour garbage.

Because of ordering a takeaway to make others pour garbage, such people have already surpassed the boundaries in interpersonal relationships.

But such cases around us are everywhere:

Unfamiliar relatives come from their hometown, can't live in the hotel, have to play a floor shop in your 50 -flat house, and then give him a guide for free;

Ordinary friends go abroad to play, you caught this rare opportunity to let go, let her help bring this with this, and then add a sentence, "Don't add my purchasing fee";

Friends' friends have restaurants. You finish meals in this restaurant, quickly pull out your mobile phone, call your friends urgently, and let him contact his friends to give you the best price.

Cai Kangyong once said: "Even if a very close friend, I can't help you all the time. People must grasp the size between people's communication.

People who have no sense of scent are disliked in most social occasions, because they often do not understand, the relationship is intimate, no matter how good the relationship is, there should be a line that cannot be accessed at will.

3

Luo Zhenyu shared one thing.

Once, he went to a bank to work. Because of the complex business, the bank manager at the bank has handled it for more than an hour. During the period, the manager was always professional on hand, serious and rigorous.

About two weeks later, Luo Zhenyu met the manager in the supermarket.

After chatting, Luo Zhenyu knew that the manager was a loyal fan of his show, and even he had many novel ideas for the show.

After knowing this, Luo Zhenyu felt strange: "Why did you say you didn't know me in the bank that day?"

After listening to the manager, he answered very simply, "At that time, you were a customer. I was at work. I should not talk about anything that has nothing to do with business."

I have to say that the bank manager is an adult with distinctive boundaries. He knows what happens and what time to say.

In the old saying, "Everything is damaged, and you need to grasp the size."

Those who live transparent will have a suitable sense of distance.

4

Adelemist Adele proposed a theory called the subject separation.

If you want to solve the troubles of interpersonal relationships, you must distinguish what your subject and what are the subjects of others. I am only responsible for doing my affairs, and you are only responsible for doing your affairs.

Specifically, how to distinguish whether one thing is your subject or the subject of others?

Here are two principles for reference:

① Who will bear the result of this matter first?

② Look at this thing who do it

I mentioned in "The Courage to Be Disted":

"You are the son of a family business owner and the heir designed by the parents, but you have chosen the job of the book administrator and are not interested in the inheritance of the family business. Your parents are furious for this, and even you want to stab for you. Don't come back, never come back, cut off your parent -child relationship with you. "

If you are the son of this boss, maybe you will be in trouble.But if you look at the perspective of "separation", do you want to lose your temper?Do you want to cut off the relationship?It is not your subject at all, but your parents' subject.And you don't need to care about it at all.Learn to distinguish yourself, focus on doing your own, and try not to interfere with others as much as possible. This is to maintain boundaries.

With the "sense of boundaries", we are the greatest respect for interpersonal relationships.

Don't let the sense of boundaries destroy your social relationship.

mutual encouragement.

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