When the child is crying, should it be stopped or should you persuade?Look at the professor's point of view

The well -known psychologist Debora McNamara said: "When the child is crying, he should let him vent his emotions instead of forcibly stopping it. Because the cry itself is harmless, the stop is!"

When the well -known actor Ma Yizhen talked about the education of the two daughters, he regretted it very much: "I regret doing crying immune training for the eldest daughter." She said, although after two days of crying immunohistor training at that time, 1 The older daughter can sleep by herself.

But at the age of 1 and a half, she always woke up during the sleeping process, crying and hugging her while crying. However, Ma Yizhen tried to persuade himself not to respond and learn to ignore it.

When the child saw that he did not get any response, he could only cry until he was tired before he slept. It was so for a long time.

Later, when Ma Yizhen really distressed her child, when she woke up again in the middle of the night, she immediately patted her back. Slowly, she not only stopped crying, but also fell asleep quickly. After several times, the eldest daughter just slept stable at night. Seeing Ma Yizhen's parenting experience, a netizen held different opinions.

"My son has just cried, and I immediately coaxed him. Now it becomes a crying ghost, not like a man at all." The netizen said helplessly. This year, her son was 6 years old, but she still cried, even if she just cooked the dishes that he didn't like to eat, and controlled his time to watch TV, he could become the reason why he cried.

When I saw Ma Yizhen's crying for the child, one was in favor of timely and persuaded, and the other regretted that I cried when she cried. The two very different attitudes made many netizens very puzzled, and I don't know who should adopt.

In fact, for children's crying situation due to emotional reasons, it is time to stop. Professor Li Meijin, a well -known psychologist, has given a few comprehensive views to parents for reference!

In a lecture, Professor Li Meijin mentioned that before the child was 6 years old, his mood was changing and showing the situation of crying at any time, which was a headache for most parents.

And with the previous famous children's psychological expert Piajie, children aged 2 to 5 have begun to have self -independence. The development of their own ability cannot keep up with the inner thoughts and needs, and then it is easy to have psychological gaps and frustration. Therefore, it becomes a lot of emotional fluctuations, and it is easy to cry, which can be said to coincide.

Therefore, Professor Li Meijin believes that when the child is crying by emotions and crying, parents must "cry, parents laugh." In other words, parents should first keep calm and accept his crying behavior.

Then wait for the child to cry almost, and then patiently guide him to calm down, so that the brain gradually controls the emotional brain. Finally asked the cause of emotional fluctuations, found the problem together, and taught him to learn to solve the problem. After several calm and rational treatment, children can develop their habits and abilities to control emotions!

From the above, it is not difficult to see that in many cases, the seemingly unreasonable crying is often caused by the necessary stages of development. Especially the "four do not" proposed by a number of psychologists such as Li Meijin, it is likely to affect the child's physical and mental health!

Parents' guidance is incorrect. Often, not only can children not allow children to spend this period smoothly, but they also miss the opportunity to cultivate his emotional control ability.

First: Don't hit a child

There is an old saying in our country called "Filial Son of the Drum Baseball." Many parents like such a simple and rude "stick education". However, when the child is crying, the parent's violence will not only hurt the child's body, but the psychological trauma and shadow are irreversible.

According to the survey, 80%of people with violence have experienced "stick education" during their childhood.

When they grow up, they will only use violence to solve it, and their emotions are also irritable. Therefore, when facing the child's crying, parents should not choose to hit their children to stop.

Second: Don't scold

"Liang Yan's words of three winter warmth hurts people in June cold." Children who were originally emotionally lowered had to bear the scolding of parents when wept, and their psychological damage was equivalent to "language violence", which was not only huge but also far -reaching.

"You don't want to cry", "I will throw you away" and "I will throw you away" and so on. Such a threat may be able to stop the child from crying, but it will also make him lack of security and become timid, inferior, and sensitive. It even affects parent -child relationships.

Third: Don't talk about preaching

The educator Rousseau said: "The three most useless education in this world is preaching, self -movement, and losing temper." Children in excitement, if the emotions have not been calm, can not listen to the parents of the parents. This is not only the case for adults, and so on the child.

Therefore, what parents should do is to let the children crying calm down as soon as possible, and then patiently talk, understand the reason for crying, to solve the problem faster.

Fourth: Don't leave

Many parents think that when their children cry, they need to be cold when they are so excited. For example, walk away alone and leave the child alone in the room. As everyone knows, this method can easily make him mistakenly think that his parents are indifferent or detained him. These misunderstandings can easily make him lack of security, and emotions are more difficult to calm down.

Therefore, when the child is crying, he must stay with him. When he cries enough, the emotions will gradually calm down and then communicate.

Conclusion:

The Dutch psychology expert Adwentes believes: "Tears are of great significance, especially in their childhood, it can convey helplessness to the greatest extent." This also tells parents that they must learn to accept children's appearance.Crying behavior can be handled in the most calm attitude and the most scientific and reasonable way to ensure the child's physical and mental health!(The picture source network of this article, if there is any infringement, please contact delete)

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