Under the influence of the epidemic, how to make children perceive life?(Inner attached parent -child strategy) | companion reading

Article Source | China Education News, May 22, 2022, the fourth edition

Author | Wang Ling

Broadcast | Wu Bingjie

Host of the column | Du Runnan

A sudden and long -lasting new crown pneumonia epidemic has broken the calmness of life, and we have encountered huge challenges in a beautiful life. We can no longer enjoy the beauty of food. It is inevitable and affected by life.

It can be said that the epidemic has narrowed the extension of a better life, but it provides an opportunity for the return of family education from a certain perspective.

Give children high -quality companionship

Accompanying is the best family education, but a pain point for parent -child companionship is that many parents do not realize that accompanying is not equal to companionship.

For example, some parents brush their mobile phones while watching their children's homework, and some parents take their children out for dinner. They sit together but do not communicate. They take their mobile phones to brush. Even some parents are addicted to the Internet themselves, and such companionship is almost worthless.

In fact, there are many high -quality companions, such as parent -child reading, games, labor, exercise, etc., through seeing needs, participating together, actively communicating, and establishing mutual trust, so that children can experience life even in the epidemic situation. The beauty and richness.

I am the mother of two children. The boss is 12 years old and the second child is 5 years old. In these ways of companionship in my house, I tried to give children high -quality companionship and build a better relationship with them.

My eldest daughter is 12 years old and has lived in school in the first year. Adolescent children are easy to be awkward with their parents, but they need to talk and care in particular. As a mother, I also want to understand her situation and thoughts, and I hope that there is a close relationship with my daughter.

Every Saturday night when she goes home, I will take a fitness class with her, and then talk about her campus life, her little gossip, etc. in a relaxed environment, which has become our weekly routine activities.

My two treasures like Pindu Gao very much. Le Qinjun's class suspended during the epidemic prevention and control. Every night, the child's father will accompany him to fight Lego. Before going to bed every night, we will definitely have half an hour of parent -child reading time.

These activities with children have greatly promoted our parent -child relationship, and also reduced the adverse effects of epidemic on family life. More importantly, only through careful company can we improve the mutual trust between the two parties. Children will communicate with their parents as soon as possible when they encounter difficulties and setbacks.

Establish two -way communication based on mutual respect

Two -way communication on the basis of mutual respect is an important way for children to perceive beautiful.

During the prevention and control of the epidemic, home online classes have made many families' parent -child relationships facing huge challenges. Establishing good communication between parents and children can be said to be an important breakthrough.

Parents can communicate with their children to set their learning goals and plans by communicating, and to allocate time allocation of learning and entertainment. When establishing such communication mechanisms, parents should pay attention to four principles.

The first is to establish intimate but boundary parent -child relationships. Recently, in some psychological variety shows, many children talked about their own troubles from the forcibly arranged by their parents. What they eat, what to wear, what they learn, and who do friends, and parents must manage it. This non -border parent -child relationship suffocate children.

The second is to change the standard for measuring children. Parents need to have a correct and scientific view of talent, rather than using the score as the only criterion for measuring whether the child is excellent. This is also an important prerequisite for alleviating the relationship between parent -child contradictions and establishing a good relationship with children.

There are differences in the ability and characteristics of each child. Some children are good at discipline learning, some children are good at sports, and some children have very strong ability to do. Some children are social experts. These are worth seeing and affirmed by parents.

The third is to teach according to their aptitude and insist on doing difficult things. It is much easier to teach in family education than in school education. In school, a class teacher must control dozens of children, and a teacher may have to manage hundreds of children, but in the family, parents have enough time and energy to do this, let the children use their strengths, gain their strengths, get obtaining their strengths, get obtained The value and satisfaction of growth. If you can do this, the pressure of communication between parent -child will be much less.

The fourth is to persist in appreciation, which is an important part of effective communication. Parents will appreciate their children and affirm and encourage their children in a timely manner. They are not only a lubricant for effective communication, but also the cornerstone of children's continuous growth.

Of course, the underlying logic of these principles is that parents treat their children as independent individuals, treat children, respect their children, and understand children equally.

Labor education and words are magic weapons

Sweet and suffering are opposite and uniform. Through labor to make children feel the hardships of life, it helps them to experience the beauty of life and hardship. For example, there was a case on the Internet. A father made a disgusting son experienced "whether it was heavy or the pot" through labor education.

Chinese parents are easy to ignore the importance of allowing children to do housework. Through a set of statistics from the daily labor time of elementary school students in various elementary school students, we can see that Chinese elementary school students have the shortest daily labor time. Among them, American elementary school students are 72 minutes, Thai elementary school students are 66 minutes, British primary school students are 30 minutes, and only Chinese elementary students have only primary school students. 12 minutes.

Some Chinese parents are also used to using housework as a tool for punishment for children, which is also very unsuitable. During the prevention and control of the epidemic, parents may wish to let their children participate more in housework, so that they can cultivate their life skills and experience the happiness and difficulty of labor. There is still a point in family education that the influence of parents' words and deeds on children is very important. Parents' positive attitudes towards life, self -control of self -control, and the ability to continue, good, and beautiful, etc. are all combustion agents for children's growth, which can effectively help children feel the beauty of growth and life.

My daughter recently participated in a class speech at the school. The theme of her speech was a Chinese learning method. In the speech, the secret to summarizing Chinese learning is "Reading Diligence Pens extensively and expressing complete common practice." In the "diligence pen", she quoted my WeChat reading notes.

I have the habit of reading a book a week, and sometimes I read a book with my daughter. I found that my study and reading habits have a great impact on their children.

In any environment, the essence of family education will not change. Even in the face of the challenge of the epidemic, parents can still make their children feel the beauty of life and the motivation to grow.

Author | Wang Ling, deputy chairman of the Family Education Professional Committee of the Chinese Education Society

Editor in charge | Du Runnan

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