8 TIPS Society "High -quality Companion"

The concept of "high -quality companionship" was first raised on the question of how to raise children correctly.

In fact, whether you want to build a deeper friendship with a person, or to make your love more firm and long, whether you can provide high -quality companionship are crucial.

Many people mistakenly believe that companionship does not solve any actual problems. Only by real help to benefit each other, it is more meaningful and valuable.

However, studies have proved that in some cases, simple companionship is to relieve stress and heal the heart, which has better effects than real help (Rocks, 1987). In addition, companionship can improve a person's mental health and buffer certain life pressure.

Think about it, do you feel lonely and a little angry because you have accompanied you with your heart? Or when the other party is in the trough and needs you to accompany, you spend time without any effect?

In fact, high -quality companionship is not time, but whether you spend that time together. Today, KY will share 8 Tips with high -quality companionship. You can share it with those who you want TA to accompany you ~

1. Catch the negative emotions of TA

When a person needs to accompany, the mood is usually very low. It is essential to have the ability to catch the opponent's negative emotions. This requires us to be able to do well.

For example, when the other party releases the emotions that cannot be digested, we should not judge according to our own subjective, but try to perceive the emotions of the other party first, think about what the true source behind the other party's emotions is, and understand the situation. Give comfort, so that the other party can better understand and understand his current emotions (Waddell, 2002), and feel safe in interaction with you.

It can be said that a person with strong ability ability, the inner of TA is like a solid, large -capacity container, which can not only accommodate its own emotions, but also to accommodate others.

If you are not a person with strong ability, you can catch your emotions through some ways. We can create a "emotional box" for our negative emotions in our hearts and store our negative emotions. Or to complete the records and finishing through the emotional calendar, so that we can clarify the origin of emotions and make further control and adjustment.

2. Be a serious listener

Many times, when a person actively proposes to be accompanied by someone, what TA needs most is that someone can listen to what TA said seriously. We can bring high -quality companionship by actively listening to Active Listening.

Actively listen to three points:

Concentric, although you don't necessarily agree with TA all words, it is reasonable to understand that TA has such a feeling from the perspective of TA. For example, you can say, "Is this difficult for you?" Let the other party know that you see and admit that all the feelings of TA feelings. Put your attention in what the other person says, without critical or negative listening, instead of thinking about how to express your own views, let alone stand on your own stand to judge what TA says. A good listener, listen to the first place, do not substitute too much self. By confirming the other party's thoughts, the other party feels that you really understand the feelings and needs of TA, and are willing to provide support. You can try to say, "It sounds like ... what do you need me to do?". This will help the other party feel more respect than blindly.

When your listening satisfies these three points, you can bring the other party's feelings and understanding.

3. Following attention

Our attention always seems to be easily dispersed. Even when I was idle, it was difficult to let go completely, and I couldn't help but start to brush Douyin, Weibo, and even stared at the quiet circle of friends.

The little habit of "unable to come down" like this, after accumulation, will become a small stone that is stuck between two people, making you gradually alienate and unfamiliar.

And when you put down your mobile phone, take back all your attention, and focus on the current exchanges, then any activity can become a high -quality companion.

In addition, even if you don't say anything, gaze can help you convey the signal you support. Keeping your eyes can let the other party know that you are paying attention to TA, and you are also concerned about what TA is talking about, so that TA can be loved, valued, understood, and supported (Gordon, 2022).

4. When providing companionship in different places, try to return as much as possible

When two people are in different places and the other party needs you to accompany, it will be an extremely important thing to go back in seconds.

Studies have confirmed that the higher the frequency of the partner's news, the faster the speed, and the higher the satisfaction of the two people in a long distance (Holtzman et al., 2021).

Similarly, psychological counseling and therapist Silva NEVES believes that in daily life, if you can send messages to the other party from time to time, even if you just love Emoji and emoticons, you can play a role in enhancing feelings.

It is also important to respond in a timely manner for the maintenance of friendship. We are not saying that you will return to TA in seconds, but if the other party needs you, you are going to respond to TA, then it is best to arrange for a period of time to concentrate on interacting with the other party.

If under the influence of distance, you feel that you do n’t know the other person ’s lives, do n’t want the communication between the two people to float on the surface, you can try to read a book, or a movie, and share your feelings Essence Such a topic can not only create a new thing, but also make you feel that the life of the two people is "connected", and it can also help understand the other person's current status and ideas and make in -depth dialogue (Steber, 2019).

5. "What are you doing today?"

Maybe you ask the other party's question every day, but you don't necessarily realize the role that the problem can really play.

Marriage and family therapist Irene Schreiner proposed that spending 20-30 minutes a day to discuss the experience of this day carefully to share things that make you feel stress or bring challenges, those things that have not developed according to the plan can effectively pull the effects to pull effectively to pull effectively pull The distance between the two partners made the talker feel that they really got the support of the partner and enhanced the cohesion and trust between the two (Steber, 2019).

This simple problem is actually expressing your concern to your partner and your interest in TA.

Kernberg, a psychoanalytic master, believes that the vital part of the love experience is the sincere interest in lover. When you have a sincere interest in the other party, TA will also invest in this relationship more and strengthen your connection.

However, it is worth noting that this sentence should not make this sentence be a casual daily politeness, and it is confused when there is no words.

If your partner seriously describes what happened all day, you can only get your obfuscation and cope, which will only make the other party more sad and lose the desire to share.

6. Create a "tangible" relaxed memory together

One of the misunderstandings that we can easily enter is to complete the preparation of the entire "surprise" by ourselves, hoping that the other party can experience our efforts from the results to our efforts and feelings for TA.

However, psychologist KLAPOW proposed (Steber, 2019), the "bonding" of the relationship should be performed in a small amount, and it is best to choose things that two people do not feel stressful. The surprise of careful preparation will also put pressure on the other party, worrying about whether you can give an equal response, and fear that the relationship becomes unbalanced.

In contrast, if you can have a high -quality communication on the road of walking and the table of eating, the effect of improving the relationship may be better than a grand outbound trip.

There are many ways to accompany like this. Whether you are with your partner or a friend, you can learn new things together, go to somewhere to feel nature, and even simply make a meal together ... Through these activities, let the memory "be harmonious", stay in souvenirs or or In the photo, every time you see these items, you can think of the time that two people share together and accompany each other.

The most important thing is that you have created that memory, not one person, and the other simply enjoy the results.

7. Appointment in advance to meet in advance,

The feeling of continuing you is still accompanying TA when you are not on TA

If we cannot be accompanied frequently, we can also extend the duration of "surviving" with regular arrangements to meet with partners, family, and friends.

When you meet this time, you make an appointment for each other in advance, and the existence of that day itself becomes expected.

You can take turns to be responsible for the planning of dating to meet the other party's wishes, or invite the other party to accompany themselves to complete a long -awaited thing. No matter who is responsible, no matter what the day, this day is always exciting.

In the time of looking forward to meeting, you will feel joy and excitement like the other person has been with your side.

This appointment is also a commitment to the relationship, which can bring a sense of security. I believe that your feelings are echoed in this relationship, and you will have a more positive view of future development (Boucher, 2016 2016 To.

8. If TA is by your side, add some physical contact

After getting up, will you have a good morning with your partner? Will there be a real hug before starting work?

The fact is that these seemingly deliberate "sense of rituals" are the most ideal ways to enhance feelings (SANER, 2019).

Give TA a warm hug or kiss, even if there is only one minute of contact, it can effectively deepen the intimacy.

This is also applicable to accompanying friends. Proper hug, shoulders, and palms can have a positive impact on your friendship.

Limb contact can promote the release of hormones such as dopamine and endorphins in the human body, making each other feel happy and reduce stress (Robinson, 2013; Sumioka, 2013).

More importantly, it is actually released a signal, "I am open to you, I am willing to be close to you."

References:

BOUCHER, A. C. (2016). The Relationship: Partners' Behaviors and their Impaact On Overall SatisFaction.

Carrère, S., & Gottman, J. M. (1999). Predicting Divorce AMONG Newlyweds from the First Three MINUTES of a Marital Conflict Discussion. Family Process, 38 (3), 293-301.gordon. Quality Time Love Language IMPACTS Your Relationship.verywellMind.

Gottman, J. M., Coan, J., CarRere, S., & SWANSON, C. (1998). Predicting Marital HAPPIPINESS and Stability from Newlywed Interactions. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 5-22.

Holtzman, S., Kushlev, K., Wozny, A., & Godard, R. (2021). Long-distance texting: Text messaging is linked with higher relationship satisfaction in long-distance relationships. Journal of social and personal relationships, 38 (12), 3543-3565.

Robinson, K. M. (2013). 10 Surprising health benefits of sex. Webmd.

Sner, e. (2019) .how Much Time Do You Actually Need to speak with your partner? The guardian.

Steber, C. (2019). THE 15 best ways to spend free time with your partner if you want to stream your bondle.

Sumioka, H., Nakae, A., KANAI, R., & Ishiguro, H. (2013). Huggable Communication Medium decreases Cortisol Levels. Scientific reports, 3 (1), 1-6.

Waddell, m. (2018). Inside lives: psychoanalysis and the grewth of the personality.routledge.

Wing, R. R., & Jeffery, R. W. (1999). Benefits of recruiting participants with friends and increasing social support for weight loss and maintenance. Journal of consulting and clinical psychology, 67(1), 132.

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