You are more self -disciplined, why is it more uncomfortable?

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The following is the audio of the full text of Miss Sister

Author | Asmita Karanje

Translation | nicky

Reward | Yi Li

Grand School | Zhu Chenxi

Reading | Hu En

Artist | Old carving worm

Edit | 蓝 |

We often feel ashamed of inefficient production efficiency, but the busiest, the more we represent the happiness?

Have you been tired of those "self -rescue" suggestions for old teeth, for example: "You need to get up at 5 in the morning to pursue your dream", "You need to struggle for 80 hours a week like Elon Musk", "," "You need to be effective every minute in your life," "You need to be more self -disciplined in your life."

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In fact, most of this is written for the algorithm, not for readers, so you will find that the same famous saying and suggestion are reused, and in the process Various fuel and vinegar in the process of creation.

I know that for the past, this kind of "self -rescue" words are effective in people's lives, but with the replacement of the times, these ancient "formulas" are no longer effective.

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The therapist Matthew Jones said, "Our society emphasizes productivity and professional ethics. These two capitalist and materialist systems. These two types of by -products will make people feel unhappy, so the society makes them let them make them. I believe that the only way to get rid of unhappy is to spend money on the "Quick Repair" that does not act in actual. "

I tried to get up at 5 am a week. It was still winter. When I first got up, it was dark. I made half an hour of yoga, meditated for 15 minutes, and listened to a podcast. Then I took a bath and started writing my blog.

To be honest, at that time I felt my eyes were still hot and there was no motivation. At about 9 in the morning, I fell asleep again, and I fell asleep for nearly 2 hours! guess what? At this time, I woke up at 11 o'clock, and I felt worse than I woke up at 8 o'clock.

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I do not oppose the early getting up, and I do not completely oppose getting up at 5 in the morning. I like the peace of dawn and the feeling of the world. But does this really help you improve productivity?

Perhaps this is the most efficient in the morning, but this is not suitable for everyone. For me, I worked most efficiently at 5 pm. Therefore, I can complete most of my work at this time, or provide my blog with ideas and writing themes.

I have many other examples to prove that the chicken soup -style suggestions that these webs have not worked most of the time. But it is not that these strategies have no effect, but that it may have a negative impact on my mental health. For a long time, I felt guilty because I woke up later than others. I once believed that "because of this habit, I am destined not to be so successful."

Via: giphy

Until I read more about the rhythm of day and night, I understood that everyone had a different job-sleep cycle. As long as you can sleep for 7-8 hours of peace, you will be very happy when you wake up, which laid the foundation for your work for a day. If your eyes are hot half an hour after you wake up, it means that you don't sleep enough.

Those who advocate this suggestion believe that shame inspires people to take action. But they forgot that shame can also cause mental stress, such as promoting the belief of "I am not good". This belief can lead to reduced productivity and self -shame. It can be said that this is a vicious circle that will cause you to fail.

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"We live in such a world, and most people still agree with such beliefs, that is, shame is a good tool for people to keep the rules. This is not only wrong, but also dangerous." - Brene Brown (Brene Brown)

So, what can we do about this?

01 Stop guilty

You must understand that this is your own life, and only you know what it is best for you. Don't feel guilty because others let you feel guilty about your leadership, and set a practical goal for yourself.

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"Limited productivity refers to setting a completely unrealistic goal or timetable for yourself, and then blame when you fail to achieve the goal."

"You have done enough." —— Whenever you think you do n’t do much, let this sentence remind you at all times. Remember, life is not perfect and will never be perfect. Because perfect is a myth. Even those who think of life and fulfilling their achievements do not always follow everything they preach. They are also fragile, although they may not show you the most vulnerable side, but this does not mean that it does not exist.

02 Treat your own mental health seriously

Once you recognize the problem, it is actually very simple to get a solution. For example, take a break on weekends and relax yourself, but pay attention to reducing time on electronic devices. Give the brain and body to rest, so that you can recover from the previous week.

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Understand your boundaries. You can't have an uncertain goal, such as: if you make money can inspire you to do more, how much do you need to define "more"? Or how much money do you have to make to satisfy yourself? This is not necessarily a "ultimate goal", a goal that can be achieved temporarily in the short term. With this goal, you can know that once I reached this milestone, I can have time to rest a little.

Doing nothing is actually a skill. This is the most easily underestimated skill in our time. If you understand and master its importance, you can use it to motivate yourself.

Via: freepik

The famous Israeli writer Yuval Noah Harari said he had a two -month righteous thoughts for a two -month righteous thoughts every year. In fact, his first book "Homo sapiens" benefited from his first VIPASSANA course experience. He meditates regularly every day, meditation is the core of his writing.

Do nothing but get more. This is the magic of meditation. It can help us build stronger concentration, can filter out noise, and focus on important things. Therefore, it is a good choice to develop regular meditation.

Via: freepik

03 Adopt the concept of "slow life"

Before making a response, listen, understand and think about it. Understand the purpose of what you do and why you do it.

Living in the moment. Ignore the rules and do not respond to time. Don't live according to a fixed timetable, there is no fun. The most exciting part of life is its uncertainty. We always have countless things to do, so we have to choose how to spend our time.

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Taking emotions as a measure, know when to stop. I like routine business because it can instill self -discipline, but I often like to change routine business and keep it interesting. Otherwise, I can't always realize the feeling of enjoyment.

Focusing on mentality rather than productivity. Happiness is in your heart. More busyness is not equal to more happiness. Don't be confused by the propaganda of "self -rescue masters" and do things that suits you. Believe that you already have a lot of wisdom, you don't need so many suggestions, all you need is some inner peace.

Via: dribbble

"If we know that we are rushing to death, some of us will start to slow down their footsteps." - Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Reference (click slide to view)

1. Matthew Jones. (2017, Oct 19). 11 Billion reaSons the Self Help Industry Doesm You YO Know the Truth About Happiness. Inc. Retrived Oct 19, 2017, FROM HTTPS:/www.inc.Com. Matthew-Jones/11-Billion-Reason-SELF-HELP-IDOESNT-WANT-YOU-Know- About-html

2. Natalie Silver. (2020, July 13). Everything to Know About Your Circadian Rhythm. healthline. retribed July 13, 2020, from https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sleep/circadian-rhythm

3. EZRA Klein. (2017, Feb 28). Yuval Harari, Author of Sapiens, on How Meditation Made Him Better Historian. Vox. Retrived Feb 28, 2017, from https://www.vox.com/2017/2/ 28/14745596/yuval-Harari-Sapiens-Interview-Meditation-EZRA-KLEIN

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