Huang Lei and Liu Zhenyun's dinner dialogue flowed out: Don't let your right or wrong view, destroy your social interaction

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Previously, I did not intend to watch a period of "Living Life". The arrival of the writer Liu Zhenyun allowed the show to experience a slow life, and experienced the key to a comfortable interpersonal communication.

In the show, Huang Lei was busy preparing ingredients to cook in the kitchen. Liu Yijun also helped. At this time, Liu Zhenyun, who couldn't cook, looked a little embarrassed.

But Liu Zhenyun didn't stand up. He said respectfully: "Teacher Huang, I'm really embarrassed, I don't know how to cook, I can't help you, I don't know how to intervene."

Even if you can't cook, it is enough to make Huang Lei feel warm enough to say such a word.

Then, Liu Zhenyun saw Huang Lei take out the lettuce, and he said: "Teacher Huang, do you know that there is a kind of food, it is the lettuce silk."

Huang Lei listened, and echoed the voice: "I will, I will give you a cold."

After a while, Huang Lei took out the cauliflower, and Liu Zhenyun also said, "Teacher Huang, what are you looking forward to cauliflower?"

After hearing it, Huang Lei said: "I think we put the cauliflower with pork belly, fried dry, and the juice is delicious."

At this time, Liu Zhenyun attached to him and said, "Yes, it is delicious that the pork belly is made into a small fried meat!"

Huang Lei immediately arranged Zhang Yixing and added a small fried meat to Teacher Liu Zhenyun.

Watching Teacher Huang has been adding vegetables to himself, Liu Zhenyun also said a little embarrassed: "Teacher Huang Lei's character is really admirable, because he immediately takes a friend's joke."

Teacher Huang was happy when he heard this. After all, what else is more advanced than praise.

Seeing this, I couldn't help marveling at the language of Mr. Liu Zhenyun's muchun wind. It seemed that the clouds were light and light, but they met their needs and took into account others.

However, a large number of people in life are in reverse ways, and then destroy each other's relationship again and again.

They only care about themselves, measure their behaviors with their own standards, and make non -black or white evaluation.

In the show, at the dinner table, Liu Zhenyun put forward a point of view on this social method:

"There are no disputes in the world in the world.

Is it your right or my right, now right or long -term.

Everyone's position angle is different. For example, the elephant, saying that it is right to block the wall, pulling the tail and saying a rope is right. "

It's too transparent.

There is nothing wrong with opposing debates, but the position between people is different.

It is just that when you fall in this conflict of confrontation, the intimate relationship will be slowly consumed.

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There is a sentence in "High EQ Chat": A person who can speak will make you get closer to him, and your problem will become no problem.

3 suggestions to make you notice your solidified communication mode, so as to better maintain interpersonal relationships.

1. Master the emotional ABC theoretical management emotions

Emotional ABC theory is an emotional theory proposed by psychologist Elis. ABC is the first letter of 3 English words, which refers to::

Activating event: stimulate event

Belief: Faith

Consequence: Result

Simply put, the ABC theory of emotions refers to: A is the indirect cause of C, and B is the direct cause of C.

In other words, the inspiration of the incident itself does not directly lead to emotional consequences, but the awareness and evaluation of the inspiration incident based on its own beliefs, leading to emotional consequences.

Imagine, assuming that one day you encounter leaders on the road, but the leader does not say hello to you. What will you do?

If you think that leaders may be thinking about things and not noticing you, then this matter has no effect on you.

However, if you think that the leader is intentionally ignored because you hit him last time, you are likely to worry about it next day.

In the final analysis, things themselves do not affect people, and people are only affected by things.

In most cases, if you can find your own mistakes, you can relieve it and even solve emotional distress.

Samuel said: "The world is like a mirror: frowning, it also frowned to look at you; smiling at it, it also laughed at you."

When you pack your emotions, you will find that the world can be so beautiful.

2. Respect the wishes of others

In the past two years, my friends often sent a message to complain to me in the middle of the night. As soon as I guessed, she was urged to marry again.

My friend is nearly 30 years old and is the only daughter of the family. Although parents are still enlightened, they can't bear the urging of time.

My friend Kai Cheng said with his parents. He never had a blind date, and he would never enter the marriage without finding the candidate who thought it was appropriate.

But her parents are currently firmly believed that if she continues to let her be the master, her marriage may be far away.

In this way, every holiday, her parents arranged several blind dates for her.

The parent's attitude was too tough this time, she couldn't help, so she had to grieve and go to the field.

In fact, the experience of a friend is not an example.

Many parents have forced them to do something unwilling to do regardless of their children's wishes.

Writer Li Shanglong said that all such problems are because people lack at least tolerance.

In the final analysis, this is precisely determined by human nature: people always like to manage others, and always like to force others to do things according to their wishes, so that they are right.

But in fact, everyone has their own unique ideas and hardships. Even if we can't fully understand, we must learn to respect others. In "The Art of Love", From defines what true respect:

"Respect means that paying attention to the other party should grow and perform according to their own nature.

Therefore, respect also contains the meaning of not using each other. I hope to be loved by his own way and grow up for himself, instead of serving my purpose. "

Anyone is a complex individual that is constructed by different native family beliefs, different growth experiences and different knowledge backgrounds.

Only by allowing others and respecting others can they feel your goodwill and willing to continue a relationship.

3. Pay attention to emotional links

Emotional connection refers to a two -way emotional connection.

If you read "Dream of Red Mansions", you may notice a detail. Miaoyu has a cleanliness and a valuable Cheng Kiln tea cup. Just because Liu Ye drank a cup, he was too pickled.

Miaoyu takes Baodi and Daiyu to drink body tea, using two good tea cups, and Baoyu, who is followed by, is the usual green jade tea cup. This is a differentiated emotional connection, which shows that Miao Yu treats Baoyu different.

Baoyu can naturally interpret the signal, but considering that it is a spiritual confidant with Miao Yu and the emotional connection with Daiyu. In order to highlight the psychological boundary, there is no emotional connection of Miaoyu. Device, changed the tea cup.

Whether it is a strong connection or weak connection, as long as it involves social interaction, the emotional connection needs to be considered, otherwise it is difficult to maintain and handle interpersonal relationships.

Only by fully identifying the value and necessity of emotional connections can we promote the formation of high -quality interpersonal relationships.

Generally speaking, when you build an emotional connection, you can try "self -disclosure".

The so -called self -exposure refers to the process of voluntarily in front of others when the individual is interacting with others, and the process of truly showing his inner feelings and information.

According to privacy, this kind of information disclosure has a large scope that can from public information to personalized information, to private information.

You can also try "positive response".

Emotional connection is a two -way emotional connection. If one party releases the emotional connection signal, the other party does not properly establish an emotional connection without correct interpretation and active response.

Come and not be polite, the key to emotional connection lies in two -way interaction, there are come and go.

Remember to read a sentence: the essence of interpersonal communication is to make both parties feel comfortable.

Don't let your right or wrong view destroy the original harmonious relationship.

mutual encouragement.

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