[Psychological Health] "I don't learn it anymore! Anyway, I can't take good exams anyway! Parents can respond like this

Whenever the exam, there are always children who say emotionally, "I don't learn! Anyway, I can't take the test!" Many parents fell into thought after listening ...

At this time, parents should not be anxious to criticize their children. From this sentence, the child actually revealed that he was unconfident in learning. This is a very dangerous signal!

At this time, what parents should do most is to communicate with their children to see what caused the children to pay to gain. What is the reason why learning is becoming more and less confident?

For children in adolescence, this situation is not uncommon.

Children who have not yet had rich experience in life and immature minds. Several tests were frustrated, and they were easy to discard after they could not get fun in their studies. In fact, there are many performances for children to learn. Parents must not think that only the children have dropped out of school, they have a bad school emotion:

Mild learning

The main manifestation is that you do n’t like to learn, have conflicts about learning, do not concentrate in class, do not complete homework, copy your homework or deal with homework, etc., and you are mild learning.

Mate -study

Think of ideas, put into action, do not listen to class, often appear as disciplinary phenomena such as lateness or even absenteeism. Interpersonal relationships will also have problems. They are no longer a good student who respects teachers and unite students.

Learn high -school

Thoughts and actions have developed into psychological problems. They are full of fear of learning and psychologically inferior. They are unwilling to return to school again. They dare not face teachers and classmates. Such students often take a break or drop out.

Although different types of students have differences in performance, they will have a great impact on grades.

So, as parents, how can we help children cliff and let them regain their confidence in learning?

It's not that I don't want to learn, but I can't see hope

Reason: Don't understand your own advantages

In high school, a classmate in the class dropped out of school early. He didn't have much contact with him. I only remember that when everyone was studying on weekdays, it was very serious to see that he was writing. You can feel that he learned very hard, but the exam was behind the class every time.

He also has a strong inferiority. He studied all day, leaving him without thinking about his advantages and exerting his potential. Later, he always told other classmates that he was not a study of school, and began to mix.

Every school has such a class of students. They can't see hope. They are on the surface, but they are giving up the edge of their hearts. The root cause is that their evaluation of their ability is not objective enough. Just because of one or two failures, they fully deny their ability. The ability to resist frustration in adversity is low, and some people even desperate themselves.

Countermeasure

At the middle of the middle school, discovering and realizing the potential requires the help of teachers and parents to put forward constructive opinions based on their rich life experience.

Parents can encourage their children to follow their interests. Usually, interest is where the advantage is. But there is a question here. It depends on whether interests are in line with the environmental conditions. If you do not have the conditions to change the environment, you must consider developing your own potential.

Finally, the most important thing is that there must be an open mind. I want to know that there is a simple way to open the degree of openness: you can list things that are not interested or even disliked on the book. The more the better, the better, and then analyze what are the principles and what are the principles?

Does the persistence on those non -principle issues restrict your vision? Does it affect your potential discovery and development? The more taboos a person is on non -principle issues, the more restrictions. few.

It's not that I don't want to learn, but I don’t know why

Reason: The goal is not clear

They all came from middle school, who's youth is not confused! To say the real learning purpose, how many of us can say clearly at the middle school stage? Everyone is different, and it is normal for this problem to be confused, but it is not right to have the idea of ​​hate learning or uselessness because they do not understand this problem.

Countermeasure

The correct goal setting is to first determine what kind of life you want to live, and then choose a tool that can allow you to achieve this goal, so that your life will not have deviations. For example, your life goal is to want to be a happy and contributed person. After you clarify this ultimate goal, you can choose your tools.

It is necessary for parents to discuss with their children on this issue, help children clarify their goals, help them make self -positioning, give him a visible future, and re -evoke the motivation to learn.

It's not that I don't want to learn, but I can't learn

Reason: Low learning skills

From the perspective of learning time, this type of students are not lost at the first or second place in the class. However, endless learning pressure made them unable to lift their heads. The surrounding Xueba easily passed into the class and even the first few grades.

Students in this situation are typical "low -quality diligence". Their diligence is performed, showing others and showing themselves, maybe for the praise of the teacher and parents. Maybe It is to make myself feel regret when I look back for a day. When my grades are not good, I comfort myself.

But such children are also the most likely to complete a class of students who have changed to students in a short period of time, because they lack only an excellent learning method, and for a period of time to settle the management they have learned hard before kind. Countermeasure

Tell your child: First, stop yourself. When you feel too busy or too blind, you might as well stop from time to time, which will make yourself sober and less useless. "

Then, make in -depth thinking about basic knowledge, follow the teacher's review plan, master the basic knowledge of the textbook, understand the basic topics, and thoroughly understand the classroom king of the classroom, the king of efficiency. Facts have proved that moving the brain to think about the basic knowledge, and it is much better than learning a lot of knowledge than swallowing dates.

Finally, find a method that suits you and build your own knowledge structure. You can use the method of the wrong question. After each exam, take the initiative to analyze the test papers to analyze the loss points of each question. Even if you have a full score, you must carefully summarize the experience. Which classmates have higher scores than himself and which classmates have better sorting out the wrong questions. He has to obtain experience from the strengths of others to help him improve better.

It's not that I don't want to learn, but I can't learn

Reason: Low cognitive ability

This type of students, as the so -called students who can't learn before, can take the same means to some extent, because "learning can not" be the result of "not learning", "not learning" is "learning can’t learn "s reason. When you go further and further on the road where you can't learn, you are tired and excited, showing a state of "back to light". Congratulations, you have successfully transitioned from "not learning" to "learning."

The root cause of "learning cannot" is poor cognitive ability. Studies have shown that from the seventh grade to the ninth grade, children's cognitive ability is not an equalization improvement. Children with high cognitive ability are lower than cognitive ability at this stage. The child's surface is obviously prominent.

Countermeasure

Cognitive ability includes: observation, memory, imagination, attention. Parents' relationships, family atmosphere, and environment when they were young will affect their children's cognitive ability.

After simply resting and improving learning methods, students who "can't learn" can soon be able to invest in a tense learning atmosphere. Students who are limited by the level of cognition need to take a little time, relax the body and mind, completely adjust the state, and relax the mind.

It's not that I don't want to learn, but I can't learn

Reason: emotional instability

Some students have too much attention to the ranking and other people's views, which leads to extremely anxiety before each exam, affecting the performance of the exam and subsequent enthusiasm for learning.

The impact of emotions on learning is very great, and good emotions include curiosity, pleasure, optimism and confidence, etc.; Bad emotions include sorrow, anxiety, depression, etc. Children in adolescence have deteriorated quickly. If these emotions do not get timely guidance and adjustment, emotional communication disorders will be formed, showing anxiety, anger, and affecting normal life and learning.

Countermeasure

In addition to perceiving their children's emotional changes in time, teachers and parents give enlightenment and comfort, they also teach their children to adjust their emotions themselves. Including self -incentives, language hints, environmental regulation, transfer adjustment method, music regulation method, etc.

If the grades are not satisfactory, the emotion of disappointment and anxiety is generated, and you must not be stunned, worried, unable to let go, or lose. Tell your children that this is a common sense. Everyone's grades will have ups and downs, and there must be a correct understanding of the exam. Then, listen to soothing music, relax in a beautiful environment, or do a exercise until sweating, the bad emotions naturally do not retreat.

In short, if the child can say, "It's not that I don't want to learn, but ..." Then, congratulations, this is actually a good phenomen Learn the enthusiasm of existence and use appropriate methods to help them get out of their current dilemma.

The influence of teachers and parents

In addition to their own reasons, children do not rule out external reasons. After all, they are easily affected by external minds.

Teacher

Children hate learning, and sometimes have a lot to do with the teacher, especially after the first and high school stages, the latter is replaced by the teacher.

Because at this stage, teachers and students are familiar with a process, and it is a long process. Many students, especially the "celebrity" students of the teacher, will feel cold when the new teacher takes over. Teacher, then developed to dislike learning.

Parent

Parents expect their children to be too high, and the children's evaluation methods are single. They only pay attention to the results and do not pay attention to the process. Let the children bear a lot of pressure and make the child feel that they are learning for the parents. If the scores cannot reach the ideal result, It will be reprimanded, frustration, and eventually hate learning.

Some students are unilateral, and some are caused by multiple aspects.

Countermeasure

1. More encouragement: I used to have such a student who learned the countdown first, but I like my class very much because I respect him and I encourage him. I like to ask questions in the way of "driving a train". I may be the only teacher who will not bypass him, but I will give him a relatively simple question. In this simple way, I will win him to win him. Trust and love.

2. less expectations: moderate expectations can give children motivation. Excessive expectations. Children are like snails holding shells. Parents need to learn to boast their children. As when a child, every new ability to learn will surprise you, it will make you think your child is a "prodigy". Too high, how hard for children is not as good as other children's children. Of course, less expectations are not without expectations, nor is it "broken jar and broken". Parents who have no expectations. The children also have no motivation to learn.

3. A target of the tree: The junior high school is for the college and the high school is for the college. This goal is no problem, but for many students, the goal is too large, too long, too long, and will not have too much to the children Inspiration, only by setting up small goals, such as students with similar levels, and constantly achieving small goals, can we bring a sense of success and accomplishment, and continuously motivate to move towards the best goals.

Why those online games can make children so obsessed, because they will set small goals for the game, so that the child will not be able to extricate themselves once it contacts. If this method is used in learning, what will it look like?

4. More changes: The most important thing is that the child's own changes have occurred. You must analyze it because you do n’t want to learn or do n’t learn from learning. Find different solutions according to different reasons. For different reasons, you can find different solutions. For different reasons Those who do not want to learn must establish goals. For those who do not learn, they must learn more from the students around them, especially the same level as themselves, but they also improve their successful experiences. Their successful experience will provide you with direct and effective help.

Ask the teacher to learn how to learn, do not talk about it, you must take your own homework, your own test paper, your own wrong questions, and let the teacher help analyze. During the analysis process, the teacher can find your problem, and you will give it to give you, and you will give it to give you, and you will give it. You provide suggestions that this effect is the best.

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