Harvard University Study: At a certain age, the less friends, the better your life is

Lonely was confused before,

After loneliness, it grew up.

Author: insight yy

In 2020, Professor ROSATI and Professor Machanda of Harvard University published a study and was widely discussed.

In 1995, they found 21 male gorillas, put them together, and kept observing their social changes.

At the beginning, gorillas often gather, whether they are familiar or unknown, they always have to communicate.

In the past 10 years, the interaction between them is getting less and less, and more time is treating themselves.

Even if it is a rare communication, they are with fixed partners.

In the end, the researchers came to an amazing conclusion:

Gorilla's social activities will become less and less with age.

In fact, people are the same. At a certain age, fewer and fewer friends around them are the norm of life alone.

1

The older the age, the smaller the circle

I have read a word:

The invalid friend is the same as the extra items. It looks like it is really useful. In fact, it is useless at all.

When people are young, they always like to add addition to the circle and be keen to make various contacts.

After looking at it later, I found that most of the social networking is useless.

In the sketch "What is a friend", Pan Changjiang is a boss. He often boasted that his friends had many friends and do things well.

The wife couldn't see it, and the truth was broken in a word: "That's the money that you have money. When you are in trouble, no one will come to help you."

Pan Changjiang was dissatisfied, and he lied to say that he went bankrupt and called to borrow money from his friends.

First, I called my friends old money. When the other party heard it, he hung up the phone immediately.

When he turned over, the machine was turned off directly.

He couldn't hang on his face, and he called the old grandson who had a life -friendly friendship. As a result, not only did he not borrow money, but was ridiculed by the other party.

At this moment, the subordinate Xiao Li took the gift to visit the New Year and said that he would like to thank President Pan for his support.

Unexpectedly, after knowing that he went bankrupt, Xiao Li immediately found an excuse to slip. When he left, he did not forget to go back to the gift.

He was paralyzed on the sofa with his buttocks, and then realized that those who pushed the cups and changed their friends and called friends were all false.

The so -called friends, not how diligent you have given you when your scenery, how many wines you drink with you;

Instead, when you are weak, you can pull you in front of you and sit with you beside you.

In fact, life is a big sieve, and many of us will pretend it at first.

As long as he knows, he is willing to put him as a friend into his own sieve.

It was not until middle age that it was gradually discovered that too many false feelings have long been blown away by the wind.

In a large sieve, there are a few friends left, but they are full of grains and sincere.

Just like the writer Xue Xiao Chan said:

At a certain age, people are recycled. At the end, the three or two confidants and a cup of light tea are living to live life as what they want.

The maturity of a person starts from the circle and returns to himself.

2

The less friends, the better the relationship

In his later years, Mr. Lu Xun wrote in the letter to his friends:

Life is enough to be confident, and the world is regarded as the same as the same.

He believes that friends don't need too much, but if there is a confidant, then he should treat him as a hand -footed brother.

In the second half of Mr. Lu Xun's life, there are very few friends, but the relationship is unusual.

There is a friend called Xu Shouchang.

He is the fellow of Lu Xun. They have taken the same oolong boat and rushed to Japan to study together.

He is the only friend who has been in Lu Xun and has always made good friends from his teenager to his old age.

When Lu Xun just returned from Japan, his life did not improve a little, and he was very distressed.

When Xu Shouchang learned of this, he immediately asked Chief Education Cai Yuanpei to help him.

It didn't take long for Cai Yuanpei to invite Lu Xun to work in the Beijing Education Department.

And Lu Xun arrived in Beijing because he was very difficult to live, and his life was quite difficult.

In order to improve Lu Xun's food, Xu Shouchang always asked his wife to make more home -cooked food, and then gave Lu Xun himself.

At the most difficult time in Lu Xun's life, Xu Shouchang always accompanies, or comforts, or try his best to help.

Even if Lu Xun died, his funeral was cooked in one hand.

The relationship between the two of them, as Xu Shouchang laughed at Lu Xun after many years of acquaintance:

"There is an old house in Peiping Hutong called the" Tiger Tail ". Could you be my" Tiger Tail "?" The old man? "

The more the relationship is, the better, it is inseparable from the mutual support of each other, and it is inseparable from the precipitation of the years.

After middle age, everyone is difficult to get in the gap between careers and families.

The best way to operate a good circle is no longer to maintain the general turn with the unswervingly;

Instead, the limited time and energy are left to the few three or two good friends.

You must always understand that although there are few friends, it is better than one sincerely.

3

The more you are, the more mature people are

Actor Chen Kun once wrote a essay "Suddenly Going to Tibet".

He tells the story of a streaming star under a spotlight to return to himself and enlighten the meaning of life.

Chen Kun, who was in his early 20s, made his debut at its peak. When he graduated from college, he appeared in the "Golden Fan Family" actor.

The TV series was a fire in CCTV, and Chen Kun became a household name overnight.

With such glory, from the perspective of outsiders, he has long been a winner in life.

But only he knew that in the face of the sudden wealth and reputation, he could not fight.

At that time, in front of Chen Kun's house was full of cars every day, with endless guests, a banquet after another.

It seems to be Gatsby's manor.

When he was young, he faced the surprise of fate, but his dream was like a dream.

He began to suffer, afraid of losing the name and profit he had now, and even worried that he would die suddenly.

In this way, he got depression. He had insomnia all night, nice to the world, pessimistic, and felt that life had no sense. He almost jumped down several times, and even jumped down.

In order to cure the disease, he decisively pushed out all the interruptions and entertainment and kept himself at home.

In addition to meditation, yoga is hiking and climbing.

In the later Tibetan journey, he was looking for the soul to return.

He alone brought him unprecedented tranquility and peace, and gave him a rebirth.

As "Centennial Lonely" said: "Life will eventually be a single trip."

Only after experiencing a lonely trip and a time alone, can we have the opportunity to see our own heart.

The life of modern cities is extremely lively. Even the streets in the early morning are red.

Many people lost all kinds of wine bureaus and gatherings, but after the hustle and bustle of overnight, they looked at it and felt lonely and empty.

Schopenhauer once said: "The less you need to deal with others, the better his situation."

Although calling friends and friends make themselves happy, it is the greatest enjoyment of a person alone.

The older you are, the more you have to make a private space for yourself, stay away from external disturbances, and listen to your inner voice carefully.

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Jia Pingwa said in "Solle alone":

The real loneliness is self -evident, and occasionally a little howl, such as the beast we see; the weak is living in groups, so -called all beings.

The more people walking down in their lives, the more they find out that too much society is not beneficial, but it will only feel noisy.

Because our hearts are strong enough, we no longer rely on "group living" to warm up, and we have already become our own backing.

Loneliness was confused before, and grew up after loneliness.

At a certain age, the less you can find your friends, the better your life.

Click a praise, there are two or three confidants accompanied by each other. There is no regret in this life.

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