Night Reading | Learn to "refuse", don't make life too tired

Source: Minsheng Weekly (ID: msweekly)

Edit: Lei Yuqi (internship)

This article is reproduced, if there are copyright issues, please contact [email protected]

Learning to refuse is a "ability".

Some people are exhausted because they do not understand rejection; while others know how to refuse appropriately, life can be more comfortable.

1. Rejects meaningless social

Do you have this experience: Sometimes we have to participate in some meaningless meals for "clustering", drink some difficult wine, and say some words.

Sometimes, we do n’t have to be echoed. When the circle is not at the same time, there is no need to be strong.

After Qian Zhongshu became famous, many people visited to see the true appearance, but no matter who the visit was, he closed the door closed.

His friend Huang Yongyu once mentioned such a story.

Once, a person with identity wanted to visit Qian Zhongshu. Knowing that he didn't like to see the spleen, he deliberately picked up a day. On the second day of the new year, he came to the door with gifts. But before the man entered the door, Qian Zhongshu was separated by the door seam, and he declined to find out: "Thank you! I'm busy! I'm busy! Thank you!"

He didn't like talking to strangers, and he was almost reluctant to participate in entertainment. He seemed to be indifferent and unpopular. In fact, he was very simple.

In his opinion, meaningless society is far less than spending time and operating his own small circle.

From 17 kilometers away, he would go to the wedding of his friend Wang Wufeng, and he would also read the scene with his friend Wu Zhongkang Yongshi.

More often, he will stay at home with Yang Yan, daughter, and son -in -law, and takes a book in a corner to read a book.

There is a saying good: people get along with people, the simpler, the happier will be.

The simpler the circle, the more you don't need to worry about it; the simpler the relationship, the more comfortable it is.

There are not many friends, but in fine. Low -quality social networking is not as good as high -quality alone.

2. Refuse the consumption without bottom line

Writer Jia Pingwa once wrote in "Knock" that he moved five times in a city, but every time his home, he ushered in uninvited guests and even frequently disturbed.

Every time he opened the door because he couldn't stand the sound of knocking on the door. As a result, the people who came in were all in the industry, and they all came to embarrass him.

These people either ask him to write banners, or ask him to participate in the event for himself, and even come to find him to relieve his boredom.

After a long time, he delayed his work very much, making him unable to concentrate on writing articles at all.

In your life, in the face of a person who "consumes" you endlessly, if you do not know how to refuse appropriately, you will only face more troubles.

The painter Qi Baishi was physically and mentally exhausted because he was not good at refusing to seek painting and bargaining, and even lived in the hospital.

Later, he couldn't bear it, and wrote two confession in the living room.

One confession reads: regardless of the friendship, the gentleman is shameless, please pay for the money.

Another confession reads: Flowers and Worm Birds, each plus 10 yuan, vine and bees, each plus 20 yuan. Those who reduce prices, lose their own self -interest, and be unhappy.

When those people saw that they couldn't take more cheapness in him, they rarely went to him.

"Why do others do not take you more and more, because you are so good to speak, you will promise what you find, what you want," you give. "

In life, there are too many people who do not need to ignore it. When they treat you with a consumption of you, they are actually disrespectful.

If you blindly cater, in the end, they will only obtain private interest from you, and you will only be completely dragged down and even exhausted.

In fact, when you show your attitude and principles, it is difficult for others to have the opportunity to take advantage of you.

3. Help to refuse the super boundary

Many people are embarrassed to refuse when they face others for help.

I always think that if I do not try my best to help, it will not only hurt each other's kindness, but I can't pull this face.

In fact, of course, for help, of course, go all out. But if you exceed your ability and boundaries, it is only yourself who will eventually drag and suffer.

A small story in a TV series I have watched, the girl in the play is a person who does not understand "rejection".

Once, the girl's colleague was uncomfortable and asked her to help her work on the day of the day and signed the name at the end. The girl looked at the work materials in front of her, but because of the relationship between colleagues, she agreed with her scalp.

Later, the part of her colleague was leaked, and the girl took responsibility with grievances, and colleagues did not even comfort.

Sometimes, the dedication of the super boundary will be taken for granted.

In life, you must learn to refuse the busyness beyond your ability and boundaries.

San Mao said: "If your reason is justified, don't be afraid to refuse others. When a person speaks request, he has two answers in his heart. Therefore, it is unexpected to give him any answer. middle."

In other words, each of us has the right to reject others.

When we know what we really want, what we should cherish and care, and know how to give it to the worthy people, we can make decisive decisions and choices.

A comfortable relationship is never deliberately pleased, but to bravely express their opinions, and will not affect feelings because of this.

Source: Minsheng Weekly (ID: msweekly), hosted by the People's Daily, the only news weekly magazine that focuses on people's livelihood.

Draft

Call the original first manuscript.

Content: Inspirational stories of excitement, sincere and moving emotional stories, deep feelings of life ...

Requirements: The number of words is 800-2000 words. The article is sent in the word format in Word format, and the authorized first issued in the email title. Please attach your contact information to issue manuscripts.

Submit mailbox: [email protected]

If you do not get a reply for 10 days, please be deemed to be refunded. The author can handle it by himself.

Expedition "Night Reading" anchor

Work responsibility: read the daily "night reading" article for the public account fans. Will basic audio editing.

Resume delivery box: [email protected]

The email indicates the word "anchor":

Please send the past voice works with your resume.

/more recommendations/

- END -