Guide to Complex Action: These three sentences, with the magical power of warm people's hearts

Cohesion refers to a kind of ability to experience the situation of others, so as to achieve and understand the mood of others.

Complexity applies to anyone, and empathy is an indispensable ability in all interpersonal relationships.

Zheng Huixin, a South Korean psychotherapist and a psychiatrist, said that there is a magic magic that can turn white paper into white pigeons. She has witnessed such "magic" countless times in the past thirty years since she has worked.

As a psychotherapist, the empathy is the most powerful and practical force in the various power of Dr. Zheng Huixin's attempt and treating the injured mind.

Since the industry, Dr. Zheng Huixin had exchanged and face -to -face consultations with more than 10,000 visitors to help them divert psychological problems; she also presided over hundreds of group psychotherapy, so that many wounded people won new students.

This time, she gathered the experience and experience of these years into a book "You Are Right", and she told us how to truly feel the same, how to truly rejoice with the wounded.

"Repulse" is exactly what her new book wants to express.

After being listed in South Korea, "You Are Mine" was selected as annual books by the nine cities. In South Korea with only 50 million people, this book sold 400,000 copies within a year.

Former South Korean President Moon Jae -in published a public evaluation of this book on the media:

"Although‘ empathy and communication ’is the basic of politics, but after reading this book, I still feel that the empathy I understand is superficial and superficial.”

Some people say that empathy is inherent.

But it is not exactly. Some people may realize the essence of empathy during their journey of life and gain the ability of empathy; others can also become a good empathy through the study of the day after tomorrow.

In the book "You Are Right", Dr. Zheng summarized the 30 -year accumulated experience of helping people into three sentences to fully express empathy:

"You are right."

"How are you in your mood recently?"

"So you think so!"

When a person is desperate and painful, the most important thing is the acceptance of others' self -feelings.

The phrase "you will do that, what's the reason" or "you are right" more powerful than any other language.

And the phrase "How are you in the mood recently?" It is warm than any cold.

These three sentences seem simple, but have a direct power.

Learn to use these three sentences, you will also become a powerful and needed person.

Dr. Zheng said, "You are right", not the right or wrong on the surface. You must be the mood of the other party at that moment. Emotions are always correct, and behavior is not necessarily.

Nothing is better than "you are right" to pull each other's distance.

When friends or family members are low, you can try to use Dr. Zheng's method to accompany each other silently, give paper towels, and tell the other party that although he cannot fully appreciate his mood, he is also uncomfortable to see him so painful.

Empathy is not a simple sympathy, but to make himself a person and become a whole with him to enjoy the same experience.

This is convergence. When the other party's inner emotions are understood and affirmed, naturally, we will release the most true self in front of us.

The core point of empathy is to accept the emotions of the other party, accurately describe the other party's feelings, and give feedback rather than judge listening.

The most basic consent is not to easily "criticize and teach" by others.

But empathy is not just to talk well, or blindly agree with each other's point of view.

The empathy here is a distinctive and three -dimensional empathy.

Compassion is not emotional to cater, empathy must be from the heart.

While empathy, you must also enjoy yourself, and you must give yourself priority at any time.

Do not forget yourself at any time, this is the most important secret of empathy. At the same time as empathy, we must also learn to control the reaction of the mirror neurons, avoid ourselves from being excessive, and overwhelming the spiritual internal consumption brought by the intention.

Shaking people's hearts, not debate and persuasion, empathy is the greatest killer of the opponent.

Lonely and lonely, in poor life, we are pursuing understanding and approaching. There are no real "negative emotions", only the "internal needs" that are not understood. Since those bad emotions are the daily topics we often encounter, it is also the difficulty of leaping over by the assistance of others.

We are not the therapists, but everyone who can save others is the therapist. Including ourselves.

And empathy is the most primitive and simple and simple, which can be widely used in any relationship and conflict. As long as you master the correct password, you can use this as a starting point at any occasion to protect yourself from harm. At the same time Establish a long -lasting intimate relationship to help us be a powerful and needed person.

The path of healing is long. All feelings are right. When you recognize this, you can not only take care of others, but also take care of your heart.

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